For the 3 of you out there who haven’t seen this yet…

I appreciate this most with the sound off, but the little giggles are pretty awesome, so I recommend watching it both ways.

Babies and toddlers are kryptonite.

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Gordon M Aamoth, Jr Edelmiro Abad Maria Rose Abad Andrew Anthony Abate Vincent Abate Laurence Christopher Abel William F Abrahamson Richard Anthony Aceto Jesus Acevedo Rescand Heinrich Bernhard Ackermann Paul Acquaviva Donald LaRoy Adams Patrick Adams Shannon Lewis Adams Stephen George Adams Ignatius Udo Adanga Christy A Addamo Terence E Adderley, Jr Sophia Buruwad Addo Lee Allan Adler Daniel Thomas Afflitto Emmanuel Akwasi Afuakwah Alok Agarwal Mukul Kumar Agarwala Joseph Agnello David Scott Agnes Brian G Ahearn Jeremiah Joseph Ahern Joanne Marie Ahladiotis Shabbir Ahmed Terrance Andre Aiken Godwin Ajala Gertrude M Alagero Andrew Alameno Margaret Ann Alario Gary M Albero Jon Leslie Albert Peter Alderman Jacquelyn Delaine Aldridge David D Alger Sarah Ali-Escarcega Ernest Alikakos Edward L Allegretto Eric Allen Joseph Ryan Allen Richard Dennis Allen Richard Lanard Allen Christopher E Allingham Janet M Alonso Arturo Alva-Moreno Anthony Alvarado Antonio Javier Alvarez Victoria Alvarez-Brito Telmo E Alvear Cesar Amoranto Alviar Tariq Amanullah Angelo Amaranto James M Amato Joseph Amatuccio Christopher Charles Amoroso Kazuhiro Anai Calixto Anaya, Jr Joseph Anchundia Kermit Charles Anderson Yvette Constance Anderson John Andreacchio Michael Rourke Andrews Jean Ann Andrucki Siew-Nya Ang Joseph Angelini, Jr Joseph Angelini, Sr Laura Angilletta Doreen J Angrisani Lorraine Antigua Peter Paul Apollo Faustino Apostol, Jr Frank Thomas Aquilino Patrick Michael Aranyos David Arce Michael George Arczynski Louis Arena Adam P Arias Michael Armstrong Jack Charles Aron Joshua Aron Richard Avery Aronow Japhet Jesse Aryee Patrick Asante Carl Asaro Michael Asciak Michael Edward Asher Janice Marie Ashley Thomas J Ashton Manuel O Asitimbay Gregg Arthur Atlas Gerald T Atwood James Audiffred Louis Frank Aversano, Jr Ezra Aviles Sandy Ayala Arlene T Babakitis Eustace P Bacchus John J Badagliacca Jane Ellen Baeszler Robert J Baierwalter Andrew J Bailey Brett T Bailey Tatyana Bakalinskaya Michael S Baksh Sharon M Balkcom Michael Andrew Bane Katherine Bantis Gerard Baptiste Walter Baran Gerard A Barbara Paul Vincent Barbaro James William Barbella Ivan Kyrillos F Barbosa Victor Daniel Barbosa Colleen Ann Barkow David Michael Barkway Matthew Barnes Sheila Patricia Barnes Evan J Baron Renee Barrett-Arjune Nathaly Barrios La Cruz Arthur Thaddeus Barry Diane G Barry Maurice Vincent Barry Scott D Bart Carlton W Bartels Guy Barzvi Inna B Basina Alysia Basmajian Kenneth William Basnicki Steven Bates Paul James Battaglia Walter David Bauer, Jr Marlyn Capito Bautista Jasper Baxter Michele Beale Paul Frederick Beatini Jane S Beatty Lawrence Ira Beck Manette Marie Beckles Carl John Bedigian Michael Earnest Beekman Maria A Behr Yelena Belilovsky Nina Patrice Bell Debbie Bellows Stephen Elliot Belson Paul M Benedetti Denise Lenore Benedetto Maria Bengochea Bryan Craig Bennett Eric L Bennett Oliver Duncan Bennett Margaret L Benson Dominick J Berardi James Patrick Berger Steven Howard Berger John P Bergin Alvin Bergsohn Daniel Bergstein Michael J Berkeley Donna M Bernaerts David W Bernard William Bernstein David M Berray David S Berry Joseph J Berry William Reed Bethke Timothy Betterly Edward Frank Beyea Paul Beyer Anil Tahilram Bharvaney Bella J Bhukhan Shimmy D Biegeleisen Peter Alexander Bielfeld William G Biggart Brian Bilcher Carl Vincent Bini Gary Eugene Bird Joshua David Birnbaum George John Bishop Jeffrey Donald Bittner Albert Balewa Blackman, Jr Christopher Joseph Blackwell Susan Leigh Blair Harry Blanding, Jr Janice Lee Blaney Craig Michael Blass Rita Blau Richard Middleton Blood, Jr Michael Andrew Boccardi John P Bocchi Michael Leopoldo Bocchino Susan M Bochino Bruce D Boehm Mary Catherine Boffa Nicholas Andrew Bogdan Darren Christopher Bohan Lawrence Francis Boisseau Vincent M Boland, Jr Alan Bondarenko Andre Bonheur, Jr Colin Arthur Bonnett Frank Bonomo Yvonne Lucia Bonomo Genieve Bonsignore, 3 Seaon Booker Sherry Ann Bordeaux Krystine Bordenabe Martin Boryczewski Richard Edward Bosco John H Boulton Francisco Eligio Bourdier Thomas Harold Bowden, Jr Kimberly S Bowers Veronique Nicole Bowers Larry Bowman Shawn Edward Bowman, Jr Kevin L Bowser Gary R Box Gennady Boyarsky Pamela Boyce Michael Boyle Alfred Braca Kevin Bracken David Brian Brady Alexander Braginsky Nicholas W Brandemarti Michelle Renee Bratton Patrice Braut Lydia E Bravo Ronald Michael Breitweiser Edward A Brennan III Francis Henry Brennan Michael E Brennan Peter Brennan Thomas M Brennan Daniel J Brethel Gary Lee Bright Jonathan Briley Mark A Brisman Paul Gary Bristow Mark Francis Broderick Herman Charles Broghammer Keith A Broomfield Ethel Brown Janice Juloise Brown Lloyd Stanford Brown Patrick J Brown Bettina Browne Mark Bruce Richard George Bruehert Andrew Brunn Vincent Brunton Ronald Paul Bucca Brandon J Buchanan Gregory Joseph Buck Dennis Buckley Nancy Clare Bueche Patrick Joseph Buhse John Edwards Bulaga, Jr Stephen Bunin Matthew J Burke Thomas Daniel Burke William Francis Burke, Jr Donald J Burns Kathleen Anne Burns Keith James Burns John Patrick Burnside Irina Buslo Milton G Bustillo Thomas M Butler Patrick Byrne Timothy G Byrne Jesus Neptali Cabezas Lillian Caceres Brian Joseph Cachia Steven Dennis Cafiero, Jr Richard M Caggiano Cecile Marella Caguicla Michael John Cahill Scott Walter Cahill Thomas Joseph Cahill George Cain Salvatore B Calabro Joseph Calandrillo Philip V Calcagno Edward Calderon Kenneth Marcus Caldwell Dominick Enrico Calia Felix Calixte Frank Callahan Liam Callahan Luigi Calvi Roko Camaj Michael F Cammarata David Otey Campbell Geoffrey Thomas Campbell Jill Marie Campbell Robert Arthur Campbell Sandra Patricia Campbell Sean Thomas Canavan John A Candela Vincent Cangelosi Stephen J Cangialosi Lisa Bella Cannava Brian Cannizzaro Michael Canty Louis Anthony Caporicci Jonathan Neff Cappello James Christopher Cappers Richard Michael Caproni Jose Manuel Cardona Dennis M Carey Steve Carey Edward Carlino Michael Scott Carlo David G Carlone Rosemarie C Carlson Mark Stephen Carney Joyce Ann Carpeneto Ivhan Luis Carpio Bautista Jeremy M Carrington Michael Carroll Peter Carroll James Joseph Carson, Jr Marcia Cecil Carter James Marcel Cartier Vivian Casalduc John Francis Casazza Paul R Cascio Margarito Casillas Thomas Anthony Casoria William Otto Caspar Alejandro Castano Arcelia Castillo Germaan Castillo Garcia Leonard M Castrianno Jose Ramon Castro Richard G Catarelli Christopher Sean Caton Robert John Caufield Mary Teresa Caulfield Judson Cavalier Michael Joseph Cawley Jason David Cayne Juan Armando Ceballos Jason Michael Cefalu Thomas Joseph Celic Ana Mercedes Centeno Joni Cesta Jeffrey Marc Chairnoff Swarna Chalasani William Chalcoff Eli Chalouh Charles Lawrence Chan Mandy Chang Mark Lawrence Charette Gregorio Manuel Chavez Delrose E Cheatham Pedro Francisco Checo Douglas MacMillan Cherry Stephen Patrick Cherry Vernon Paul Cherry Nester Julio Chevalier Swede Chevalier Alexander H Chiang Dorothy J Chiarchiaro Luis Alfonso Chimbo Robert Chin Wing Wai Ching Nicholas Paul Chiofalo John Chipura Peter A Chirchirillo Catherine Chirls Kyung Hee Cho Abul K Chowdhury Mohammad Salahuddin Chowdhury Kirsten L Christophe Pamela Chu Steven Chucknick Wai Chung Christopher Ciafardini Alex F Ciccone Frances Ann Cilente Elaine Cillo Edna Cintron Nestor Andre Cintron III Robert Dominick Cirri Juan Pablo Cisneros-Alvarez Benjamin Keefe Clark Eugene Clark Gregory Alan Clark Mannie Leroy Clark Thomas R Clark Christopher Robert Clarke Donna Marie Clarke Michael J Clarke Suria Rachel Emma Clarke Kevin Francis Cleary James D Cleere Geoffrey W Cloud Susan Marie Clyne Steven Coakley Jeffrey Alan Coale Patricia A Cody Daniel Michael Coffey Jason M Coffey Florence G Cohen Kevin Sanford Cohen Anthony Joseph Coladonato Mark Joseph Colaio Stephen Colaio Christopher M Colasanti Kevin Nathaniel Colbert Michel P Colbert Keith E Coleman Scott Thomas Coleman Tarel Coleman Liam Joseph Colhoun Robert D Colin Robert J Coll Jean Collin John Michael Collins Michael L Collins Thomas J Collins Joseph Collison Patricia Malia Colodner Linda M Colon Sol E Colon Ronald Edward Comer Sandra Jolane Conaty Brace Jaime Concepcion Albert Conde Denease Conley Susan P Conlon Margaret Mary Conner Cynthia Marie Lise Connolly John E Connolly, Jr James Lee Connor Jonathan M Connors Kevin Patrick Connors Kevin F Conroy Jose Manuel Contreras-Fernandez Brenda E Conway Dennis Michael Cook Helen D Cook John A Cooper Joseph John Coppo, Jr Gerard J Coppola Joseph Albert Corbett Alejandro Cordero Robert Cordice Ruben D Correa Danny A Correa-Gutierrez James J Corrigan Carlos Cortes Kevin Cosgrove Dolores Marie Costa Digna Alexandra Costanza Charles Gregory Costello, Jr Michael S Costello Conrod K Cottoy Martin John Coughlan John Gerard Coughlin Timothy J Coughlin James E Cove Andre Cox Frederick John Cox James Raymond Coyle Michele Coyle-Eulau Anne Marie Cramer Christopher S Cramer Denise Elizabeth Crant James Leslie Crawford, Jr Robert James Crawford Joanne Mary Cregan Lucy Crifasi John A Crisci Daniel Hal Crisman Dennis Cross Kevin Raymond Crotty Thomas G Crotty John Crowe Welles Remy Crowther Robert L Cruikshank John Robert Cruz Grace Yu Cua Kenneth John Cubas Francisco Cruz Cubero Richard J Cudina Neil James Cudmore Thomas Patrick Cullen lll Joyce Cummings Brian Thomas Cummins Michael Cunningham Robert Curatolo Laurence Damian Curia Paul Dario Curioli Beverly Curry Michael S Curtin Gavin Cushny John D’Allara Vincent Gerard D’Amadeo Jack D’Ambrosi Mary D’Antonio Edward A D’Atri Michael D D’Auria Michael Jude D’Esposito Manuel John Da Mota Caleb Arron Dack Carlos S DaCosta Joao Alberto DaFonseca Aguiar, Jr Thomas A Damaskinos Jeannine Marie Damiani-Jones Patrick W Danahy Nana Danso Vincent Danz Dwight Donald Darcy Elizabeth Ann Darling Annette Andrea Dataram Lawrence Davidson Michael Allen Davidson Scott Matthew Davidson Titus Davidson Niurka Davila Clinton Davis Wayne Terrial Davis Anthony Richard Dawson Calvin Dawson Edward James Day Jayceryll de Chavez Jennifer De Jesus Monique E De Jesus Nereida De Jesus Emerita De La Pena Azucena Maria de la Torre David Paul De Rubbio Jemal Legesse De Santis Christian Louis De Simone Melanie Louise De Vere William Thomas Dean Robert J DeAngelis, Jr Thomas Patrick DeAngelis Tara E Debek Anna Marjia DeBin James V Deblase Paul DeCola Simon Marash Dedvukaj Jason Defazio David A DeFeo Manuel Del Valle, Jr Donald Arthur Delapenha Vito Joseph DeLeo Danielle Anne Delie Joseph A Della Pietra Andrea DellaBella Palmina DelliGatti Colleen Ann Deloughery Francis Albert DeMartini Anthony Demas Martin N DeMeo Francis Deming Carol K Demitz Kevin Dennis Thomas F Dennis Jean DePalma Jose Depena Robert John Deraney Michael DeRienzo Edward DeSimone III Andrew Desperito Cindy Ann Deuel Jerry DeVito Robert P Devitt, Jr Dennis Lawrence Devlin Gerard Dewan Sulemanali Kassamali Dhanani Patricia Florence Di Chiaro Debra Ann Di Martino Michael Louis Diagostino Matthew Diaz Nancy Diaz Rafael Arturo Diaz Michael A Diaz-Piedra III Judith Berquis Diaz-Sierra Joseph Dermot Dickey, Jr Lawrence Patrick Dickinson Michael D Diehl John Difato Vincent Difazio Carl Anthony DiFranco Donald Difranco Stephen Patrick Dimino William John Dimmling Marisa DiNardo Schorpp Christopher M Dincuff Jeffrey Mark Dingle Anthony Dionisio George DiPasquale Joseph Dipilato Douglas Frank DiStefano Ramzi A Doany John Joseph Doherty Melissa C Doi Brendan Dolan Neil Matthew Dollard James Joseph Domanico Benilda Pascua Domingo Carlos Dominguez Jerome Mark Patrick Dominguez Kevin W Donnelly Jacqueline Donovan Stephen Scott Dorf Thomas Dowd Kevin Dowdell Mary Yolanda Dowling Raymond Mathew Downey Frank Joseph Doyle Joseph Michael Doyle Stephen Patrick Driscoll Mirna A Duarte Michelle Beale Duberry Luke A Dudek Christopher Michael Duffy Gerard Duffy Michael Joseph Duffy Thomas W Duffy Antoinette Duger Sareve Dukat Christopher Joseph Dunne Richard Anthony Dunstan Patrick Thomas Dwyer Joseph Anthony Eacobacci John Bruce Eagleson Robert Douglas Eaton Dean Phillip Eberling Margaret Ruth Echtermann Paul Robert Eckna Constantine Economos Dennis Michael Edwards Michael Hardy Edwards Christine Egan Lisa Egan Martin J Egan, Jr Michael Egan Samantha Martin Egan Carole Eggert Lisa Caren Ehrlich John Ernst Eichler Eric Adam Eisenberg Daphne Ferlinda Elder Michael J Elferis Mark Joseph Ellis Valerie Silver Ellis Albert Alfy William Elmarry Edgar Hendricks Emery, Jr Doris Suk-Yuen Eng Christopher Epps Ulf Ramm Ericson Erwin L Erker William John Erwin Jose Espinal Fanny Espinoza Bridget Ann Esposito Francis Esposito Michael Esposito William Esposito Ruben Esquilin, Jr Sadie Ette Barbara G Etzold Eric Brian Evans Robert Evans Meredith Emily June Ewart Catherine K Fagan Patricia Mary Fagan Keith George Fairben Sandra Fajardo-Smith William F Fallon William Lawrence Fallon, Jr Anthony J Fallone, Jr Dolores Brigitte Fanelli John Joseph Fanning Kathleen Anne Faragher Thomas Farino Nancy Carole Farley Elizabeth Ann Farmer Douglas Jon Farnum John G Farrell John W Farrell Terrence Patrick Farrell Joseph D Farrelly Thomas Patrick Farrelly Syed Abdul Fatha Christopher Edward Faughnan Wendy R Faulkner Shannon Marie Fava Bernard D Favuzza Robert Fazio, Jr Ronald Carl Fazio William Feehan Francis Jude Feely Garth Erin Feeney Sean B Fegan Lee S Fehling Peter Adam Feidelberg Alan D Feinberg Rosa Maria Feliciano Edward Thomas Fergus, Jr George Ferguson Henry Fernandez Judy Hazel Fernandez Julio Fernandez Elisa Giselle Ferraina Anne Marie Sallerin Ferreira Robert John Ferris David Francis Ferrugio Louis V Fersini Michael David Ferugio Bradley James Fetchet Jennifer Louise Fialko Kristen Nicole Fiedel Samuel Fields Michael Bradley Finnegan Timothy J Finnerty Michael Curtis Fiore Stephen S R Fiorelli, Sr Paul M Fiori John B Fiorito John R Fischer Andrew Fisher Bennett Lawson Fisher John Roger Fisher Thomas J Fisher Lucy A Fishman Ryan D Fitzgerald Thomas James Fitzpatrick Richard P Fitzsimons Salvatore Fiumefreddo Christina Donovan Flannery Eileen Flecha Andre G Fletcher Carl M Flickinger John Joseph Florio Joseph Walken Flounders David Fodor Michael N Fodor Stephen Mark Fogel Thomas Foley David J Fontana Chih Min Foo Godwin Forde Donald A Foreman Christopher Hugh Forsythe Claudia Alicia Foster Noel John Foster Ana Fosteris Robert Joseph Foti Jeffrey Fox Virginia Fox Pauline Francis Virgin Francis Gary Jay Frank Morton H Frank Peter Christopher Frank Richard K Fraser Kevin J Frawley Clyde Frazier, Jr Lillian Inez Frederick Andrew Fredricks Tamitha Freeman Brett Owen Freiman Peter L Freund Arlene Eva Fried Alan Wayne Friedlander Andrew Keith Friedman Gregg J Froehner Peter Christian Fry Clement A Fumando Steven Elliot Furman Paul Furmato Fredric Neal Gabler Richard Samuel Federick Gabrielle James Andrew Gadiel Pamela Lee Gaff Ervin Vincent Gailliard Deanna Lynn Galante Grace Catherine Galante Anthony Edward Gallagher Daniel James Gallagher John Patrick Gallagher Lourdes Galletti Cono E Gallo Vincenzo Gallucci Thomas E Galvin Giovanna Galletta Gambale Thomas Gambino, Jr Giann Franco Gamboa Peter Ganci Ladkat K Ganesh Claude Michael Gann Osseni Garba Charles William Garbarini Ceasar Garcia David Garcia Juan Garcia Marlyn Del Carmen Garcia Christopher S Gardner Douglas Benjamin Gardner Harvey J Gardner III Jeffrey Brian Gardner Thomas Gardner William Arthur Gardner Francesco Garfi Rocco Nino Gargano James M Gartenberg Matthew David Garvey Bruce Gary Boyd Alan Gatton Donald Richard Gavagan, Jr Terence D Gazzani Gary Geidel Paul Hamilton Geier Julie M Geis Peter G Gelinas Steven Paul Geller Howard G Gelling Peter Victor Genco, Jr Steven Gregory Genovese Alayne Gentul Edward F Geraghty Suzanne Geraty Ralph Gerhardt Robert Gerlich Denis P Germain Marina Romanovna Gertsberg Susan M Getzendanner James G Geyer Joseph M Giaccone Vincent Francis Giammona Debra Lynn Gibbon James Andrew Giberson Craig Neil Gibson Ronnie E Gies Laura A Giglio Andrew Clive Gilbert Timothy Paul Gilbert Paul Stuart Gilbey Paul John Gill Mark Y Gilles Evan Gillette Ronald Lawrence Gilligan Rodney C Gillis Laura Gilly John F Ginley Donna Marie Giordano Jeffrey John Giordano John Giordano Steven A Giorgetti Martin Giovinazzo Kum-Kum Girolamo Salvatore Gitto Cynthia Giugliano Mon Gjonbalaj Dianne Gladstone Keith Glascoe Thomas Irwin Glasser Harry Glenn Barry H Glick Steven Glick John T Gnazzo William Robert Godshalk Michael Gogliormella Brian Fredric Goldberg Jeffrey Grant Goldflam Michelle Goldstein Monica Goldstein Steven Goldstein Andrew H Golkin Dennis James Gomes Enrique Antonio Gomez Jose Bienvenido Gomez Manuel Gomez, Jr Wilder Alfredo Gomez Jenine Nicole Gonzalez Mauricio Gonzalez Rosa Gonzalez Calvin J Gooding Harry Goody Kiran Reddy Gopu Catherine C Gorayeb Kerene Gordon Sebastian Gorki Kieran Joseph Gorman Thomas Edward Gorman Michael Edward Gould Yuji Goya Jon Richard Grabowski Christopher Michael Grady Edwin J Graf III David Martin Graifman Gilbert Franco Granados Elvira Granitto Winston Arthur Grant Christopher S Gray James Michael Gray Tara McCloud Gray Linda Catherine Grayling John M Grazioso Timothy George Grazioso Derrick Auther Green Wade B Green Elaine Myra Greenberg Gayle R Greene James Arthur Greenleaf, Jr Eileen Marsha Greenstein Elizabeth Martin Gregg Denise Gregory Donald H Gregory Florence Moran Gregory Pedro Grehan John Michael Griffin Tawanna Sherry Griffin Joan Donna Griffith Warren Grifka Ramon Grijalvo Joseph F Grillo David Joseph Grimner Kenneth George Grouzalis Joseph Grzelak Matthew James Grzymalski Robert Joseph Gschaar Liming Gu Jose Guadalupe Cindy Yan Zhu Guan Joel Guevara Gonzalez Geoffrey E Guja Joseph Gullickson Babita Girjamatie Guman Douglas Brian Gurian Janet Ruth Gustafson Philip T Guza Barbara Guzzardo Peter M Gyulavary Gary Robert Haag Andrea Lyn Haberman Barbara Mary Habib Philip Haentzler Nezam A Hafiz Karen Elizabeth Hagerty Steven Michael Hagis Mary Lou Hague David Halderman Maile Rachel Hale Richard B Hall Vaswald George Hall Robert J Halligan Vincent Gerard Halloran James Douglas Halvorson Mohammad Salman Hamdani Felicia Hamilton Robert Hamilton Frederic K Han Christopher J Hanley Sean S Hanley Valerie Joan Hanna Thomas Hannafin Kevin James Hannaford Michael Lawrence Hannan Dana R Hannon Vassilios G Haramis James A Haran Jeffrey Pike Hardy Timothy John Hargrave Daniel Edward Harlin Frances Haros Harvey Harrell Stephen G Harrell Melissa Marie Harrington Aisha Anne Harris Stewart Dennis Harris John Patrick Hart John Clinton Hartz Emeric Harvey Thomas Theodore Haskell, Jr Timothy Haskell Joseph John Hasson III Leonard W Hatton Terence S Hatton Michael Haub Timothy Aaron Haviland Donald G Havlish, Jr Anthony Hawkins Nobuhiro Hayatsu Philip Hayes William Ward Haynes Scott Jordan Hazelcorn Michael K Healey Roberta B Heber Charles Francis Xavier Heeran John F Heffernan H Joseph Heller, Jr Joann L Heltibridle Mark F Hemschoot Ronnie Lee Henderson Brian Hennessey Michelle Marie Henrique Joseph Henry William Henry John Christopher Henwood Robert Allan Hepburn Mary Herencia Lindsay C Herkness III Harvey Robert Hermer Claribel Hernandez Eduardo Hernandez Nuberto Hernandez Raul Hernandez Gary Herold Jeffrey A Hersch Thomas Hetzel Brian Hickey Ysidro Hidalgo Timothy Higgins Robert D W Higley II Todd Russell Hill Clara Victorine Hinds Neal O Hinds Mark D Hindy Katsuyuki Hirai Heather Malia Ho Tara Yvette Hobbs Thomas Anderson Hobbs James J Hobin Robert Wayne Hobson DaJuan Hodges Ronald George Hoerner Patrick A Hoey Marcia Hoffman Stephen G Hoffman Frederick Joseph Hoffmann Michele L Hoffmann Judith Florence Hofmiller Thomas Warren Hohlweck, Jr Jonathan R Hohmann John Holland Joseph F Holland Elizabeth Holmes Thomas Holohan Bradley Hoorn James P Hopper Montgomery McCullough Hord Michael Horn Matthew Douglas Horning Robert L Horohoe, Jr Aaron Horwitz Charles Houston Uhuru G Houston George Howard Michael C Howell Steven Leon Howell Jennifer L Howley Milagros Hromada Marian R Hrycak Stephen Huczko, Jr Kris Robert Hughes Paul Rexford Hughes Robert Thomas Hughes Thomas Hughes Timothy Robert Hughes Susan Huie Lamar Hulse William Christopher Hunt Kathleen Anne Hunt-Casey Joseph Hunter Robert R Hussa Abid Hussain Thomas Edward Hynes Walter G Hynes Joseph Anthony Ianelli Zuhtu Ibis Jonathan Lee Ielpi Michael Iken Daniel Ilkanayev Frederick Ill, Jr Abraham Nethanel Ilowitz Anthony P Infante, Jr Louis S Inghilterra, Jr Christopher Noble Ingrassia Paul Innella Stephanie Veronica Irby Douglas Irgang Kristin A Irvine Ryan Todd Antione Isaac Erik Isbrandtsen Taizo Ishikawa Aram Iskenderian, Jr John F Iskyan Kazushige Ito Aleksandr Valeryevich Ivantsov Virginia May Jablonski Brooke Alexandra Jackman Aaron Jeremy Jacobs Ariel Louis Jacobs Jason Kyle Jacobs Michael Grady Jacobs Steven A Jacobson Ricknauth Jaggernauth Jake Denis Jagoda Yudh Vir Singh Jain Maria Jakubiak Ernest James Gricelda E James Priscilla James Mark Steven Jardim Muhammadou Jawara Francois Jean-Pierre Maxima Jean-Pierre Paul Edward Jeffers Alva Cynthia Jeffries Sanchez Joseph Jenkins, Jr Alan Keith Jensen Prem N Jerath Farah Jeudy Hweidar Jian Eliezer Jimenez, Jr Luis Jimenez, Jr Fernando Jimenez-Molina Charles Gregory John Nicholas John LaShawna Johnson Scott Michael Johnson William R Johnston Allison Horstmann Jones Arthur Joseph Jones Brian Leander Jones Christopher D Jones Donald T Jones Donald W Jones Linda Jones Mary S Jones Andrew Jordan Robert Thomas Jordan Albert Gunnia Joseph Guylene Joseph Ingeborg Joseph Karl Henry Joseph Stephen Joseph Jane Eileen Josiah Anthony Jovic Angel L Juarbe, Jr Karen Sue Juday Mychal F Judge Paul William Jurgens Thomas Edward Jurgens Kacinga Kabeya Shashikiran Lakshmikantha Kadaba Gavkharoy Kamardinova Shari Kandell Howard Lee Kane Jennifer Lynn Kane Vincent D Kane Joon Koo Kang Sheldon Robert Kanter Deborah H Kaplan Alvin Peter Kappelmann, Jr Charles Karczewski William A Karnes Douglas Gene Karpiloff Charles L Kasper Andrew K Kates John Katsimatides Robert Michael Kaulfers Don Jerome Kauth, Jr Hideya Kawauchi Edward T Keane Richard M Keane Lisa Yvonne Kearney-Griffin Karol Ann Keasler Paul Hanlon Keating Leo Russell Keene III Joseph John Keller Peter R Kellerman Joseph P Kellett Frederick H Kelley, Jr James Joseph Kelly Joseph A Kelly Maurice P Kelly Richard John Kelly, Jr Thomas Michael Kelly Thomas Richard Kelly Thomas W Kelly Timothy Colin Kelly William Hill Kelly, Jr Robert Clinton Kennedy Thomas J Kennedy John R Keohane Ronald T Kerwin Howard L Kestenbaum Douglas D Ketcham Ruth Ellen Ketler Boris Khalif Sarah Khan Taimour Firaz Khan Rajesh Khandelwal Oliva Khemrat SeiLai Khoo Michael Kiefer Satoshi Kikuchihara Andrew Jay-Hoon Kim Lawrence D Kim Mary Jo Kimelman Andrew M King Lucille Teresa King Robert King, Jr Lisa King-Johnson Takashi Kinoshita Chris Michael Kirby Howard Barry Kirschbaum Glenn Davis Kirwin Helen Crossin Kittle Richard Joseph Klares Peter Anton Klein Alan David Kleinberg Karen Joyce Klitzman Ronald Philip Kloepfer Evgueni Kniazev Andrew Knox Thomas Patrick Knox Rebecca Lee Koborie Deborah A Kobus Gary Edward Koecheler Frank J Koestner Ryan Kohart Vanessa Kolpak Irina Kolpakova Suzanne Kondratenko Abdoulaye Kone Bon-Seok Koo Dorota Kopiczko Scott Kopytko Bojan Kostic Danielle Kousoulis John J Kren William E Krukowski Lyudmila Ksido Shekhar Kumar Kenneth Kumpel Frederick Kuo, Jr Patricia Kuras Nauka Kushitani Thomas Kuveikis Victor Kwarkye Kui Fai Kwok Angela Reed Kyte Andrew La Corte Amarnauth Lachhman James Patrick Ladley Joseph A LaFalce Jeanette Louise Lafond-Menichino David Laforge Michael Laforte Alan Charles LaFrance Juan Lafuente Neil Kwong-Wah Lai Vincent Anthony Laieta William David Lake Franco Lalama Chow Kwan Lam Stephen LaMantia Amy Hope Lamonsoff Nickola Lampley Robert Lane Brendan Mark Lang Rosanne P Lang Vanessa Langer Mary Louise Langley Peter J Langone Thomas Michael Langone Michele Bernadette Lanza Ruth Sheila Lapin Carol Ann LaPlante Ingeborg Lariby Robin Blair Larkey Christopher Randall Larrabee Hamidou S Larry Scott Larsen John Adam Larson Gary Edward Lasko Nicholas Craig Lassman Paul Laszczynski Jeffrey G LaTouche Charles Laurencin Stephen James Lauria Maria LaVache Denis Francis Lavelle Jeannine Mary LaVerde Anna A Laverty Steven Lawn Robert Lawrence Nathaniel Lawson Eugen Gabriel Lazar James Patrick Leahy Joseph Gerard Leavey Neil Joseph Leavy Leon Lebor Kenneth Charles Ledee Alan J Lederman Elena F Ledesma Alexis Leduc David S Lee Gary H Lee Hyun Joon Lee Juanita Lee Kathryn Blair Lee Linda C Lee Lorraine Mary Lee Myoung Woo Lee Richard Y Lee Stuart Soo-Jin Lee Yang Der Lee Stephen Paul Lefkowitz Adriana Legro Edward Joseph Lehman Eric Andrew Lehrfeld David Leistman David Prudencio Lemagne Joseph Anthony Lenihan John Joseph Lennon, Jr John Robinson Lenoir Jorge Luis Leon Matthew Gerard Leonard Michael Lepore Charles A Lesperance Jeff Leveen John Dennis Levi Alisha Caren Levin Neil David Levin Robert Levine Robert Michael Levine Shai Levinhar Adam Jay Lewis Margaret Susan Lewis Ye Wei Liang Orasri Liangthanasarn Daniel F Libretti Ralph Licciardi Edward Lichtschein Steven Barry Lillianthal Carlos R Lillo Craig Damian Lilore Arnold A Lim Darya Lin Wei Rong Lin Nickie L Lindo Thomas V Linehan, Jr Robert Thomas Linnane Alan P Linton, Jr Diane Theresa Lipari Kenneth Lira Francisco Alberto Liriano Lorraine Lisi Paul Lisson Vincent M Litto Ming-Hao Liu Nancy Liz Harold Lizcano Martin Lizzul George A Llanes Elizabeth C Logler Catherine Lisa Loguidice Jerome Robert Lohez Michael William Lomax Laura Maria Longing Salvatore Lopes Daniel Lopez George Lopez Luis Manuel Lopez Manuel L Lopez Joseph Lostrangio Chet Dek Louie Stuart Seid Louis Joseph Lovero Jenny Seu Kueng Low Wong Michael W Lowe Garry W Lozier John Peter Lozowsky Charles Peter Lucania Edward Hobbs Luckett Mark Gavin Ludvigsen Lee Charles Ludwig Sean Thomas Lugano Daniel Lugo Marie Lukas William Lum, Jr Michael P Lunden Christopher Lunder Anthony Luparello Gary Frederick Lutnick William Lutz Linda Anne Luzzicone Alexander Lygin Farrell Peter Lynch James Francis Lynch Louise A Lynch Michael Cameron Lynch Michael F Lynch Michael Francis Lynch Richard D Lynch, Jr Robert Henry Lynch, Jr Sean P Lynch Sean Patrick Lynch Michael J Lyons Monica Anne Lyons Patrick Lyons Robert Francis Mace Jan Maciejewski Catherine Fairfax Macrae Richard Blaine Madden Simon Maddison Noell Maerz Jennieann Maffeo Joseph Maffeo Jay Robert Magazine Brian Magee Charles Wilson Magee Joseph V Maggitti Ronald Magnuson Daniel L Maher Thomas Anthony Mahon William J Mahoney Joseph Daniel Maio Takashi Makimoto Abdu Ali Malahi Debora I Maldonado Myrna T Maldonado-Agosto Alfred Russell Maler Gregory James Malone Edward Francis Maloney III Joseph Maloney Gene Edward Maloy Christian Maltby Francisco Miguel Mancini Joseph Mangano Sara Elizabeth Manley Debra Mannetta Marion Victoria Manning Terence John Manning James Maounis Joseph Ross Marchbanks, Jr Peter Edward Mardikian Edward Joseph Mardovich Charles Joseph Margiotta Kenneth Joseph Marino Lester V Marino Vita Marino Kevin Marlo Jose Marrero John Marshall James Martello Michael A Marti Peter C Martin William J Martin, Jr Brian E Martineau Betsy Martinez Edward Martinez Jose Angel Martinez, Jr Robert Gabriel Martinez Victor Martinez Pastrana Lizie D Martinez-Calderon Paul Richard Martini Joseph A Mascali Bernard Mascarenhas Stephen Frank Masi Nicholas George Massa Patricia Ann Massari Michael Massaroli Philip William Mastrandrea, Jr Rudolph Mastrocinque Joseph Mathai Charles Mathers William A Mathesen Marcello Matricciano Margaret Elaine Mattic Robert D Mattson Walter Matuza Charles A Mauro, Jr Charles J Mauro Dorothy Mauro Nancy T Mauro Tyrone May Keithroy Marcellus Maynard Robert J Mayo Kathy Nancy Mazza Edward Mazzella, Jr Jennifer Lynn Mazzotta Kaaria Mbaya James Joseph McAlary Brian McAleese Patricia Ann McAneney Colin Robert McArthur John Kevin McAvoy Kenneth M McBrayer Brendan McCabe Micheal McCabe Thomas McCann Justin McCarthy Kevin M McCarthy Michael McCarthy Robert McCarthy Stanley McCaskill Katie Marie McCloskey Joan McConnell-Cullinan Charles Austin McCrann Tonyell F McDay Matthew T McDermott Joseph P McDonald Brian Grady McDonnell Michael P McDonnell John McDowell, Jr Eamon J McEneaney John Thomas McErlean, Jr Daniel Francis McGinley Mark Ryan McGinly William E McGinn Thomas Henry MCGinnis Michael Gregory McGinty Ann McGovern Scott Martin McGovern William McGovern Stacey Sennas McGowan Francis Noel McGuinn Patrick McGuire Thomas M McHale Keith McHeffey Ann M McHugh Denis J McHugh III Dennis McHugh Michael E McHugh Robert G McIlvaine Donald James McIntyre Stephanie Marie McKenna Barry J McKeon Evelyn C McKinnedy Darryl Leron McKinney George Patrick McLaughlin, Jr Robert C McLaughlin, Jr Gavin McMahon Robert D McMahon Edmund McNally Daniel W McNeal Walter Arthur McNeil Jisley McNish Christine Sheila McNulty Sean Peter McNulty Robert McPadden Terence A McShane Timothy Patrick McSweeney Martin E McWilliams Rocco A Medaglia Abigail Cales Medina Ana Iris Medina Deborah Louise Medwig Damian Meehan William J Meehan Alok Mehta Raymond Meisenheimer Manuel Emilio Mejia Eskedar Melaku Antonio Melendez Mary Melendez Yelena Melnichenko Stuart Todd Meltzer Diarelia Jovanah Mena Charles Mendez Lizette Mendoza Shevonne Olicia Mentis Steven Mercado Westly Mercer Ralph Joseph Mercurio Alan Harvey Merdinger George L Merino Yamel Merino George Merkouris Deborah Merrick Raymond Joseph Metz III Jill Ann Metzler David Robert Meyer Nurul H Miah William Edward Micciulli Martin Paul Michelstein Peter Teague Milano Gregory Milanowycz Lukasz Tomasz Milewski Sharon Christina Millan Corey Peter Miller Craig James Miller Douglas Charles Miller Henry Alfred Miller, Jr Joel Miller Michael Matthew Miller Philip D Miller Robert Alan Miller Robert Cromwell Miller, Jr Benjamin Millman Charles Morris Mills Ronald Keith Milstein Robert Minara William George Minardi Diakite Minata Louis Joseph Minervino Thomas Mingione Wilbert Miraille Dominick N Mircovich Rajesh Arjan Mirpuri Joseph Mistrulli Susan J Miszkowicz Paul Thomas Mitchell Richard P Miuccio Frank V Moccia, Sr Louis Joseph Modafferi Boyie Mohammed Dennis Mojica Manuel Mojica Kleber Molina Manuel De Jesus Molina Carl Molinaro Justin Molisani Brian Monaghan Franklin Monahan John Monahan Kristen Montanaro Craig Montano Michael Montesi Jeffrey Montgomery Peter Montoulieu Cheryl Ann Monyak Thomas Moody Sharon Moore Krishna Moorthy Abner Morales Carlos Manuel Morales Luis Morales Paula E Morales John Moran John Chrisopher Moran Kathleen Moran Lindsay Stapleton Morehouse George Morell Steven P Morello Vincent S Morello Yvette Nicole Moreno Dorothy Morgan Richard Morgan Nancy Morgenstern Sanae Mori Blanca Robertina Morocho Leonel Geronimo Morocho Dennis Gerard Moroney Lynne Irene Morris Seth Allan Morris Stephen Philip Morris Christopher Martel Morrison Jorge Luis Morron Garcia Ferdinand V Morrone William David Moskal Marco Motroni Cynthia Motus-Wilson Iouri A Mouchinski Jude Joseph Moussa Peter Moutos Damion O’Neil Mowatt Christopher Mozzillo Stephen Vincent Mulderry Richard Muldowney Jr Michael D Mullan Dennis Michael Mulligan Peter James Mulligan Michael Joseph Mullin James Donald Munhall Nancy Muniz Carlos Munoz Frank Munoz Theresa Munson Robert M Murach Cesar Augusto Murillo Marc A Murolo Brian Joseph Murphy Charles Anthony Murphy Christopher W Murphy Edward Charles Murphy James F Murphy Iv James Thomas Murphy Kevin James Murphy Patrick Sean Murphy Raymond E Murphy Robert Eddie Murphy, Jr John Joseph Murray John Joseph Murray, Jr Susan D Murray Valerie Victoria Murray Richard Todd Myhre Robert B Nagel Takuya Nakamura Alexander Napier Frank Joseph Naples III John Napolitano Catherine Ann Nardella Mario Nardone, Jr Manika K Narula Mehmood Naseem Narender Nath Karen Susan Navarro Joseph Micheal Navas Francis Joseph Nazario Glenroy I Neblett Rayman Marcus Neblett Jerome O Nedd Laurence Nedell Luke G Nee Pete Negron Ann N Nelson David William Nelson James Nelson Michele Ann Nelson Peter Allen Nelson Oscar Francis Nesbitt Gerard Terence Nevins Christopher Newton-Carter Kapinga Ngalula Nancy Yuen Ngo Jody Nichilo Martin S Niederer Alfonse Joseph Niedermeyer Frank John Niestadt, Jr Gloria Nieves Juan Nieves, Jr Troy Edward Nilsen Paul Nimbley John B Niven Katherine Marie Noack Curtis Terrance Noel Daniel R Nolan Robert Noonan Daniela R Notaro Brian Christopher Novotny Soichi Numata Brian Felix Nunez Jose Nunez Jeffrey Roger Nussbaum Dennis O’Berg James P O’Brien, Jr Michael P O’Brien Scott J O’Brien Timothy Michael O’Brien Daniel O’Callaghan Dennis James O’Connor, Jr Diana J O’Connor Keith Kevin O’Connor Richard J O’Connor Amy O’Doherty Marni Pont O’Doherty James Andrew O’Grady Thomas O’Hagan Patrick J O’Keefe William O’Keefe Gerald O’leary Matthew Timothy O’Mahony Peter J O’Neill, Jr Sean Gordon O’Neill Kevin O’Rourke Patrick J O’Shea Robert William O’Shea Timothy F O’Sullivan James A Oakley Douglas E Oelschlager Takashi Ogawa Albert Ogletree Philip Paul Ognibene Joseph J Ogren Samuel Oitice Gerald Michael Olcott Christine Anne Olender Linda Mary Oliva Edward Kraft Oliver Leah E Oliver Eric T Olsen Jeffrey James Olsen Maureen Lyons Olson Steven John Olson Toshihiro Onda Seamus L O’Neal John P Oneill Frank Oni Michael C Opperman Christopher Orgielewicz Margaret Orloske Virginia Anne Ormiston Ronald Orsini Peter Ortale Juan Ortega-Campos Alexander Ortiz David Ortiz Emilio Ortiz, Jr Pablo Ortiz Paul Ortiz, Jr Sonia Ortiz Masaru Ose Elsy C Osorio James R Ostrowski Jason Douglas Oswald Michael Otten Isidro D Ottenwalder Michael Chung Ou Todd Joseph Ouida Jesus Ovalles Peter J Owens, Jr Adianes Oyola Angel M Pabon Israel Pabon, Jr Roland Pacheco Michael Benjamin Packer Rene Padilla-Chavarria Deepa Pakkala Jeffrey Matthew Palazzo Thomas Palazzo Richard Palazzolo Orio J Palmer Frank Anthony Palombo Alan N Palumbo Christopher Matthew Panatier Dominique Lisa Pandolfo Paul J Pansini John M Paolillo Edward Joseph Papa Salvatore T Papasso James Nicholas Pappageorge Vinod Kumar Parakat Vijayashanker Paramsothy Nitin Parandkar Hardai Parbhu James Wendell Parham Debra Marie Paris George Paris Gye Hyong Park Philip Lacey Parker Michael Alaine Parkes Robert E Parks, Jr Hashmukhrai C Parmar Robert Parro Diane Marie Parsons Leobardo Lopez Pascual Michael Pascuma Jerrold Paskins Horace Robert Passananti Suzanne H Passaro Avnish Ramanbhai Patel Dipti Patel Manish Patel Steven Bennett Paterson James Matthew Patrick Manuel D Patrocino Bernard E Patterson Cira Marie Patti Robert E Pattison James Robert Paul Patrice Paz Victor Paz-Gutierrez Stacey Lynn Peak Richard Allen Pearlman Durrell V Pearsall Thomas Pedicini Todd Douglas Pelino Michel Adrian Pelletier Anthony G Peluso Angel Ramon Pena Richard Al Penny Salvatore F Pepe Carl Peralta Robert David Peraza Jon A Perconti Alejo Perez Angel Perez, Jr Angela Susan Perez Anthony Perez Ivan Perez Nancy E Perez Joseph John Perroncino Edward J Perrotta Emelda H Perry Glenn C Perry John William Perry Franklin Allan Pershep Danny Pesce Michael John Pescherine Davin Peterson William Russell Peterson Mark Petrocelli Philip Scott Petti Glen Kerrin Pettit Dominick Pezzulo Kaleen Elizabeth Pezzuti Kevin Pfeifer Tu-Anh Pham Kenneth Phelan Sneha Ann Philips Gerard Phillips Suzette Eugenia Piantieri Ludwig John Picarro Matthew M Picerno Joseph Oswald Pick Christopher Pickford Dennis J Pierce Bernard Pietronico Nicholas P Pietrunti Theodoros Pigis Susan Elizabeth Pinto Joseph Piskadlo Christopher Todd Pitman Joshua Piver Joseph Plumitallo John Pocher William Howard Pohlmann Laurence Polatsch Thomas H Polhemus Steve Pollicino Susan M Pollio Joshua Iousa Poptean Giovanna Porras Anthony Portillo James Edward Potorti Daphne Pouletsos Richard N Poulos Stephen Emanual Poulos Brandon Jerome Powell Shawn Edward Powell Antonio Pratt Gregory M Preziose Wanda Ivelisse Prince Vincent Princiotta Kevin Prior Everett Martin Proctor III Carrie Beth Progen Sarah Prothero-Redheffer David Lee Pruim Richard Prunty John Foster Puckett Robert David Pugliese Edward F Pullis Patricia Ann Puma Hemanth Kumar Puttur Edward R Pykon Christopher Quackenbush Lars Peter Qualben Lincoln Quappe Beth Ann Quigley Michael Quilty James Francis Quinn Ricardo J Quinn Carlos Quishpe-Cuaman Carol Millicent Rabalais Christopher Peter A Racaniello Leonard J Ragaglia Eugene Raggio Laura Marie Ragonese-Snik Michael Ragusa Peter Frank Raimondi Harry A Raines Ehtesham Raja Valsa Raju Edward Rall Lukas Rambousek Maria Ramirez Harry Ramos Vishnoo Ramsaroop Lorenzo E Ramzey Alfred Todd Rancke Adam David Rand Jonathan C Randall Srinivasa Shreyas Ranganath Anne T Ransom Faina Aronovna Rapoport Robert A Rasmussen Amenia Rasool Roger Mark Rasweiler David Alan Rathkey William Ralph Raub Gerard P Rauzi Alexey Razuvaev Gregory Reda Michele Reed Judith Ann Reese Donald J Regan Robert M Regan Thomas Michael Regan Christian Michael Otto Regenhard Howard Reich Gregg Reidy James Brian Reilly Kevin O Reilly Timothy E Reilly Joseph Reina, Jr Thomas Barnes Reinig Frank Bennett Reisman Joshua Scott Reiss Karen Renda John Armand Reo Richard Cyril Rescorla John Thomas Resta Luis Clodoaldo Revilla Eduvigis Reyes, Jr Bruce Albert Reynolds John Frederick Rhodes Francis Saverio Riccardelli Rudolph N Riccio Ann Marie Riccoboni David H Rice Eileen Mary Rice Kenneth Frederick Rice III Vernon Allan Richard Claude Daniel Richards Gregory David Richards Michael Richards Venesha Orintia Richards James C Riches Alan Jay Richman John M Rigo Theresa Risco Rose Mary Riso Moises N Rivas Joseph Rivelli Carmen Alicia Rivera Isaias Rivera Juan William Rivera Linda Ivelisse Rivera David E Rivers Joseph R Riverso Paul V Rizza John Frank Rizzo Stephen Louis Roach Joseph Roberto Leo Arthur Roberts Michael Roberts Michael Edward Roberts Donald Walter Robertson, Jr Catherina Robinson Jeffery Robinson Michell Lee Jean Robotham Donald A Robson Antonio A Rocha Raymond James Rocha Laura Rockefeller John Rodak Antonio J Rodrigues Anthony Rodriguez Carmen Milagros Rodriguez Gregory Ernesto Rodriguez Marsha A Rodriguez Mayra Valdes Rodriguez Richard Rodriguez David Bartolo Rodriguez-Vargas Matthew Rogan Karlie Barbara Rogers Scott Williams Rohner Keith Roma Joseph M Romagnolo Efrain Romero, Sr Elvin Romero Juan Romero Orozco James A Romito Sean Paul Rooney Eric Thomas Ropiteau Aida Rosario Angela Rosario Wendy Alice Rosario Wakeford Mark Rosen Brooke David Rosenbaum Linda Rosenbaum Sheryl Lynn Rosenbaum Lloyd Daniel Rosenberg Mark Louis Rosenberg Andrew Ira Rosenblum Joshua M Rosenblum Joshua Alan Rosenthal Richard David Rosenthal Daniel Rosetti Norman S Rossinow Nicholas P Rossomando Michael Craig Rothberg Donna Marie Rothenberg Nicholas Rowe Timothy Alan Roy, Sr Paul G Ruback Ronald J Ruben Joanne Rubino David M Ruddle Bart Joseph Ruggiere Susan A Ruggiero Adam Keith Ruhalter Gilbert Ruiz Obdulio Ruiz Diaz Stephen P Russell Steven Harris Russin Michael Thomas Russo, Sr Wayne Alan Russo Edward Ryan John Joseph Ryan, Jr Jonathan Stephan Ryan Matthew Lancelot Ryan Tatiana Ryjova Christina Sunga Ryook Thierry Saada Jason Elazar Sabbag Thomas E Sabella Scott Saber Joseph Francis Sacerdote Neeraha Sadaranghgani Mohammad Ali Sadeque Francis John Sadocha Jude Safi Brock Joel Safronoff Edward Saiya John Patrick Salamone Hernando Salas Juan G Salas Esmerlin Antonio Salcedo John Salvatore Salerno, Jr Richard L Salinardi, Jr Wayne John Saloman Nolbert Salomon Catherine Patricia Salter Frank Salvaterra Paul Richard Salvio Samuel Robert Salvo, Jr Rena Sam-Dinnoo Carlos Alberto Samaniego James Kenneth Samuel, Jr Michael San Phillip Sylvia San Pio Hugo M Sanay Erick Sanchez Jacquelyn Patrice Sanchez Eric M Sand Stacey Leigh Sanders Herman S Sandler James Sands, Jr Ayleen J Santiago Kirsten Santiago Maria Theresa Santillan Susan Gayle Santo Christopher Santora John A Santore Mario L Santoro Rafael Humberto Santos Rufino Conrado Flores Santos Iii Jorge Octavio Santos Anaya Kalyan Sarkar Chapelle R Sarker Paul F Sarle Deepika Kumar Sattaluri Gregory Thomas Saucedo Susan M Sauer Anthony Savas Vladimir Savinkin Jackie Sayegh John Michael Sbarbaro Robert L Scandole, Jr Michelle Scarpitta Dennis Scauso John Albert Schardt John G Scharf Frederick Claude Scheffold, Jr Angela Susan Scheinberg Scott Mitchell Schertzer Sean Schielke Steven Francis Schlag Jon Schlissel Karen Helene Schmidt Ian Schneider Thomas G Schoales Frank G Schott, Jr Gerard Patrick Schrang Jeffrey H Schreier John T Schroeder Susan Lee Schuler Edward William Schunk Mark E Schurmeier Clarin Shellie Schwartz John Burkhart Schwartz Mark Schwartz Adriane Victoria Scibetta Raphael Scorca Randolph Scott Sheila Scott Christopher Jay Scudder Arthur Warren Scullin Michael Herman Seaman Margaret M Seeliger Anthony Segarra Carlos Segarra Jason Sekzer Matthew Carmen Sellitto Howard Selwyn Larry John Senko Arturo Angelo Sereno Frankie Serrano Alena Sesinova Adele Christine Sessa Sita Nermalla Sewnarine Karen Lynn Seymour Davis Sezna Thomas Joseph Sgroi Jayesh S Shah Khalid M Shahid Mohammed Shajahan Gary Shamay Earl Richard Shanahan Neil Shastri Kathryn Anne Shatzoff Barbara A Shaw Jeffrey James Shaw Robert John Shay, Jr Daniel James Shea Joseph Patrick Shea Linda Sheehan Hagay Shefi John Anthony Sherry Atsushi Shiratori Thomas Joseph Shubert Mark Shulman See Wong Shum Allan Abraham Shwartzstein Johanna Sigmund Dianne T Signer Gregory Sikorsky Stephen Gerard Siller David Silver Craig A Silverstein Nasima Hameed Simjee Bruce Edward Simmons Arthur Simon Kenneth Alan Simon Michael J Simon Paul Joseph Simon Marianne Teresa Simone Barry Simowitz Jeff Lyal Simpson Khamladai Singh Kulwant Singh Roshan Ramesh Singh Thomas E Sinton III Peter A Siracuse Muriel Fay Siskopoulos Joseph Michael Sisolak John P Skala Francis Joseph Skidmore, Jr Toyena Skinner Paul A Skrzypek Christopher Paul Slattery Vincent Robert Slavin Robert F Sliwak Paul K Sloan Stanley S Smagala, Jr Wendy L Small Catherine Smith Daniel Laurence Smith George Eric Smith James Gregory Smith Jeffrey R Smith Joyce Patricia Smith Karl T Smith Keisha Smith Kevin Joseph Smith Leon Smith, Jr Moira Ann Smith Rosemary A Smith Bonnie Jeanne Smithwick Rochelle Monique Snell Leonard J Snyder, Jr Astrid Elizabeth Sohan Sushil S Solanki Ruben Solares Naomi Leah Solomon Daniel W Song Michael Charles Sorresse Fabian Soto Timothy Patrick Soulas Gregory Spagnoletti Donald F Spampinato, Jr Thomas Sparacio John Anthony Spataro Robert W Spear, Jr Maynard S Spence, Jr George Edward Spencer III Robert Andrew Spencer Mary Rubina Sperando Tina Spicer Frank Spinelli William E Spitz Joseph Spor, Jr Klaus Johannes Sprockamp Saranya Srinuan Fitzroy St Rose Michael F Stabile Lawrence T Stack Timothy M Stackpole Richard James Stadelberger Eric Stahlman Gregory Stajk Alexandru Liviu Stan Corina Stan Mary Domenica Stanley Anthony Starita Jeffrey Stark Derek James Statkevicus Craig William Staub William V Steckman Eric Thomas Steen William R Steiner Alexander Steinman Andrew Stergiopoulos Andrew Stern Martha Stevens Michael James Stewart Richard H Stewart, Jr Sanford M Stoller Lonny Jay Stone Jimmy Nevill Storey Timothy Stout Thomas Strada James J Straine, Jr Edward W Straub George J Strauch, Jr Edward T Strauss Steven R Strauss Steven F Strobert Walwyn W Stuart, Jr Benjamin Suarez David Scott Suarez Ramon Suarez Yoichi Sugiyama William Christopher Sugra Daniel Suhr David Marc Sullins Christopher P Sullivan Patrick Sullivan Thomas Sullivan Hilario Soriano Sumaya, Jr James Joseph Suozzo Colleen Supinski Robert Sutcliffe Seline Sutter Claudia Suzette Sutton John Francis Swaine Kristine M Swearson Brian Edward Sweeney Kenneth J Swenson Thomas Swift Derek Ogilvie Sword Kevin Thomas Szocik Gina Sztejnberg Norbert P Szurkowski Harry Taback Joann Tabeek Norma C Taddei Michael Taddonio Keiichiro Takahashi Keiji Takahashi Phyllis Gail Talbot Robert Talhami Sean Patrick Tallon Paul Talty Maurita Tam Rachel Tamares Hector Tamayo Michael Andrew Tamuccio Kenichiro Tanaka Rhondelle Cheri Tankard Michael Anthony Tanner Dennis Gerard Taormina, Jr Kenneth Joseph Tarantino Allan Tarasiewicz Ronald Tartaro Darryl Anthony Taylor Donnie Brooks Taylor Lorisa Ceylon Taylor Michael Morgan Taylor Paul A Tegtmeier Yeshauant Tembe Anthony Tempesta Dorothy Pearl Temple Stanley Temple David Tengelin Brian John Terrenzi Lisa M Terry Shell Tester Goumatie T Thackurdeen Sumati Thakur Harshad Sham Thatte Thomas F Theurkauf, Jr Lesley Anne Thomas Brian Thomas Thompson Clive Thompson Glenn Thompson Nigel Bruce Thompson Perry A Thompson Vanavah Alexei Thompson William H Thompson Eric Raymond Thorpe Nichola Angela Thorpe Sal Edward Tieri, Jr John p Tierney Mary Ellen Tiesi William R Tieste Kenneth Francis Tietjen Stephen Edward Tighe Scott Charles Timmes Michael E Tinley Jennifer M Tino Robert Frank Tipaldi John James Tipping II David Tirado Hector Luis Tirado, Jr Michelle Lee Titolo John J Tobin Richard Todisco Vladimir Tomasevic Stephen Kevin Tompsett Thomas Tong Doris Torres Luis Eduardo Torres Amy Elizabeth Toyen Christopher Michael Traina Daniel Patrick Trant Abdoul Karim Traore Glenn J Travers Walter Philip Travers Felicia Y Traylor-Bass Lisa L Trerotola Karamo Trerra Michael Angel Trinidad Francis Joseph Trombino Gregory James Trost William P Tselepis Zhanetta Valentinovna Tsoy Michael Tucker Lance Richard Tumulty Ching Ping Tung Simon James Turner Donald Joseph Tuzio Robert T Twomey Jennifer Tzemis John G Ueltzhoeffer Tyler V Ugolyn Michael A Uliano Jonathan J Uman Anil Shivhari Umarkar Allen V Upton Diane Marie Urban John Damien Vaccacio Bradley Hodges Vadas Renuta Vaidea William Valcarcel Felix Antonio Vale Ivan Vale Benito Valentin Santos Valentin, Jr Carlton Francis Valvo II Erica H Van Acker Kenneth W Van Auken Richard B Van Hine Daniel M Van Laere Edward Raymond Vanacore Jon C Vandevander Barrett Vanvelzer, 4 Edward Vanvelzer Paul Herman Vanvelzer Frederick Thomas Varacchi Gopalakrishnan Varadhan David Vargas Scott C Vasel Azael Ismael Vasquez Arcangel Vazquez Santos Vazquez Peter Anthony Vega Sankara S Velamuri Jorge Velazquez Lawrence G Veling Anthony Mark Ventura David Vera Loretta Ann Vero Christopher James Vialonga Matthew Gilbert Vianna Robert Anthony Vicario Celeste Torres Victoria Joanna Vidal John T Vigiano II Joseph Vincent Vigiano Frank J Vignola, Jr Joseph Barry Vilardo Sergio Villanueva Chantal Vincelli Melissa Vincent Francine Ann Virgilio Lawrence Virgilio Joseph Gerard Visciano Joshua S Vitale Maria Percoco Vola Lynette D Vosges Garo H Voskerijian Alfred Vukosa Gregory Kamal Bruno Wachtler Gabriela Waisman Courtney Wainsworth Walcott Victor Wald Benjamin James Walker Glen Wall Mitchel Scott Wallace Peter Guyder Wallace Robert Francis Wallace Roy Michael Wallace Jeanmarie Wallendorf Matthew Blake Wallens John Wallice, Jr Barbara P Walsh James Henry Walsh Jeffrey P Walz Ching Wang Weibin Wang Michael Warchola Stephen Gordon Ward James Arthur Waring Brian G Warner Derrick Washington Charles Waters James Thomas Waters, Jr Patrick J Waters Kenneth Thomas Watson Michael Henry Waye Todd Christopher Weaver Walter Edward Weaver Nathaniel Webb Dinah Webster Joanne Flora Weil Michael T Weinberg Steven Weinberg Scott Jeffrey Weingard Steven George Weinstein Simon Weiser David M Weiss David Thomas Weiss Vincent Michael Wells Timothy Matthew Welty Christian Hans Rudolf Wemmers Ssu-Hui Wen Oleh D Wengerchuk Peter M West Whitfield West, Jr Meredith Lynn Whalen Eugene Whelan Adam S White Edward James White III James Patrick White John Sylvester White Kenneth Wilburn White, Jr Leonard Anthony White Malissa Y White Wayne White Leanne Marie Whiteside Mark P Whitford Michael T Wholey Mary Catherine Wieman Jeffrey David Wiener Wilham J Wik Alison Marie Wildman Glenn E Wilkenson John C Willett Brian Patrick Williams Crossley Richard Williams, Jr David J Williams Deborah Lynn Williams Kevin Michael Williams Louie Anthony Williams Louis Calvin Williams III John P Williamson Donna Ann Wilson William Wilson David Harold Winton Glenn J Winuk Thomas Francis Wise Alan L Wisniewski Frank Thomas Wisniewski David Wiswall Sigrid Wiswe Michael Wittenstein Christopher W Wodenshek Martin P Wohlforth Katherine Susan Wolf Jennifer Yen Wong Siu Cheung Wong Yin Ping Wong Yuk Ping Wong Brent James Woodall James John Woods Patrick J Woods Richard Herron Woodwell David Terence Wooley John Bentley Works Martin Michael Wortley Rodney James Wotton William Wren John Wayne Wright Neil Robin Wright Sandra Lee Wright Jupiter Yambem Suresh Yanamadala Matthew David Yarnell Myrna Yaskulka Shakila Yasmin Olabisi Shadie Layeni Yee William Yemele Edward P York Kevin Patrick York Raymond R York Suzanne Youmans Barrington Young Jacqueline Young Elkin Yuen Joseph C Zaccoli Adel Agayby Zakhary Arkady Zaltsman Edwin J Zambrana, Jr Robert Alan Zampieri Mark Zangrilli Ira Zaslow Kenneth Albert Zelman Abraham J Zelmanowitz Martin Morales Zempoaltecatl Zhe Zeng Marc Scott Zeplin Jie Yao Justin Zhao Ivelin Ziminski Michael Joseph Zinzi Charles A Zion Julie Lynne Zipper Salvatore Zisa Prokopios Paul Zois Joseph J Zuccala Andrew S Zucker Igor Zukelman List of Victims on American Airlines Flight 11 Anna Allison David Lawrence Angell Lynn Edwards Angell Seima Aoyama Barbara Jean Arestegui Myra Joy Aronson Christine Barbuto Carolyn Beug Kelly Ann Booms Carol Marie Bouchard Robin Lynne Kaplan Neilie Anne Heffernan Casey Jeffrey Dwayne Collman Jeffrey W Coombs Tara Kathleen Creamer Thelma Cuccinello Patrick Currivan Brian Paul Dale David Dimeglio Donald Americo Ditullio Alberto Dominguez Paige Marie Farley-Hackel Alexander Milan Filipov Carol Ann Flyzik Paul J Friedman Karleton DB Fyfe Peter Alan Gay Linda M George Edmund Glazer Lisa Reinhart Gordenstein Andrew Peter Charles Curry Green Peter Paul Hashem Robert Jay Hayes Edward R Hennessy, Jr John A Hofer Cora Hidalgo Holland John Nicholas Humber, Jr Waleed Joseph Iskandar John Charles Jenkins Charles Edward Jones Barbara A Keating David P Kovalcin Judith Camilla Larocque Natalie Janis Lasden Daniel John Lee Daniel M Lewin Sara Elizabeth Low Susan A Mackay Karen Ann Martin Thomas F McGuinness, Jr Christopher D Mello Jeffrey Peter Mladenik Carlos Alberto Montoya Antonio Jesus Montoya Valdes Laura Lee Morabito Mildred Naiman Laurie Ann Neira Renee Lucille Newell Kathleen Ann Nicosia Jacqueline June Norton Robert Grant Norton John Ogonowski Betty Ann Ong Jane M Orth Thomas Nicholas Pecorelli Berinthia B Perkins Sonia M Puopolo David E Retik Jean Destrehan Roger Philip Martin Rosenzweig Richard Barry Ross Jessica Leigh Sachs Rahma Salie Heather Lee Smith Dianne Bullis Snyder Douglas Joel Stone Xavier Suarez Madeline Amy Sweeney Michael Theodoridis James Anthony Trentini Mary Barbara Trentini Pendyala Vamsikrishna Mary Alice Wahlstrom Kenneth Waldie John Joseph Wenckus Candace Lee Williams Christopher Rudolph Zarba, Jr List of Victims on United Airlines Flight 175 Alona Abraham Garnet Edward Bailey Mark Lawrence Bavis Graham Andrew Berkeley Touri Bolourchi Klaus Bothe Daniel Raymond Brandhorst David Reed Gamboa Brandhorst John Brett Cahill Christoffer Mikael Carstanjen John J Corcoran III Dorothy Alma de Araujo Ana Gloria Pocasangre Debarrera Robert John Fangman Lisa Anne Frost Ronald Gamboa Lynn Catherine Goodchild Peter M Goodrich Douglas Alan Gowell Francis Edward Grogan Carl Max Hammond, Jr Christine Lee Hanson Peter Burton Hanson Susan Kim Hanson Gerald Francis Hardacre Eric Hartono James Edward Hayden Herbert Wilson Homer Michael Robert Horrocks Robert Adrien Jalbert Amy N Jarret Ralph Kershaw Heinrich Kimmig Amy R King Brian Kinney Kathryn L LaBorie Robert G Leblanc Maclovio Lopez, Jr Marianne Macfarlane Alfred Gilles Marchand Louis Mariani Juliana McCourt Ruth Magdaline McCourt Wolfgang Peter Menzel Shawn M Nassaney Marie Pappalardo Patrick J Quigley IV Frederick Charles Rimmele III James Roux Jesus Sanchez Victor J Saracini Mary Kathleen Shearer Robert M Shearer Jane Louise Simpkin Brian David Sweeney Michael C Tarrou Alicia N Titus Timothy Ray Ward William Michael Weems List of Victims at the Pentagon (Not Including Flight 77) Note: USA – United Stated Army; USN – United States Navy SPC Craig S Amundson, USA YN3 Melissa Rose Barnes, USN MSG Max J Beilke, Retired IT2 Kris Romeo Bishundat, USN Carrie R Blagburn COL Canfield D Boone, ARNG Donna M Bowen Allen P Boyle ET3 Christopher L Burford, USN ET3 Daniel M Caballero, USN SFC Jose O Calderon-Olmedo, USA Angelene C Carter Sharon A Carver SFC John J Chada, USA, Retired Rosa Maria Chapa Julian T Cooper LCDR Eric A Cranford, USN Ada M Davis CAPT Gerald F DeConto, USN LTC Jerry D Dickerson, USA IT1 Johnnie Doctor, Jr, USN CAPT Robert E Dolan, Jr, USN CDR William H Donovan, USN CDR Patrick Dunn, USN AG1 Edward T Earhart, USN LCDR Robert R Elseth, USNR SK3 Jamie L Fallon, USN Amelia V Fields Gerald P Fisher AG2 Matthew M Flocco, USN Sandra N Foster CAPT Lawrence D Getzfred, USN Cortez Ghee Brenda C Gibson COL Ronald F Golinski, USA, Retired Diane Hale-McKinzy Carolyn B Halmon Sheila MS Hein ET1 Ronald J Hemenway, USN MAJ Wallace Cole Hogan, Jr, USA SSG Jimmie I Holley, USA, Retired Angela M Houtz Brady Kay Howell Peggie M Hurt LTC Stephen N Hyland, Jr, USA Lt Col Robert J Hymel, USAF, Retired SGM Lacey B Ivory, USA LTC Dennis M Johnson, USA Judith L Jones Brenda Kegler LT Michael S Lamana, USN David W Laychak Samantha L Lightbourn-Allen MAJ Stephen V Long, USA James T Lynch, Jr Terence M Lynch OS2 Nehamon Lyons IV, USN Shelley A Marshall Teresa M Martin Ada L Mason-Acker LTC Dean E Mattson, USA LTG Timothy J Maude, USA Robert J Maxwell Molly L McKenzie Patricia E Mickley MAJ Ronald D Milam, USA Gerard P Moran, Jr Odessa V Morris ET1 Brian A Moss, USN Teddington H Moy LCDR Patrick J Murphy, USNR Khang Ngoc Nguyen DM2 Michael A Noeth, USN Ruben S Ornedo Diana B Padro LT Jonas M Panik, USNR MAJ Clifford L Patterson, Jr, USA LT Darin H Pontell, USNR Scott Powell CAPT Jack D Punches, USN, Retired AW1 Joseph J Pycior, Jr, USN Deborah A Ramsaur Rhonda Sue Rasmussen IT1 Marsha D Ratchford, USN Martha M Reszke Cecelia E (Lawson) Richard Edward V Rowenhorst Judy Rowlett SGM Robert E Russell, USA, Retired CW4 William R Ruth, ARNG Charles E Sabin, Sr Marjorie C Salamone COL David M Scales, USA CDR Robert A Schlegel, USN Janice M Scott LTC Michael L Selves, USA, Retired Marian H Serva CDR Dan F Shanower, USN Antionette M Sherman Diane M Simmons Cheryle D Sincock ITC Gregg H Smallwood, USN LTC Gary F Smith, USA, Retired Patricia J Statz Edna L Stephens SGM Larry L Strickland, USA LTC Kip P Taylor, USA Sandra C Taylor LTC Karl W Teepe, USA, Retired SGT Tamara C Thurman, USA LCDR Otis V Tolbert, USN SSG Willie Q Troy, USA, Retired LCDR Ronald J Vauk, USNR LTC Karen J Wagner, USA Meta L (Fuller) Waller SPC Chin Sun Pak Wells, USA SSG Maudlyn A White, USA Sandra L White Ernest M Willcher LCDR David L Williams, USN MAJ Dwayne Williams, USA RMC Marvin Roger Woods, USN, Retired IT2 Kevin W Yokum, USN ITC Donald M Young, USN Edmond G Young, Jr Lisa L Young List of Victims on American Airlines Flight 77 Paul W Ambrose Yeneneh Betru Mary Jane Booth Bernard C Brown, II CAPT Charles F Burlingame III, USNR, Retired Suzanne M Calley William E Caswell David M Charlebois Sarah M Clark Asia S Cottom James D Debeuneure Rodney Dickens Eddie A Dillard LCDR Charles A Droz III, USN, Retired Barbara G Edwards Charles S Falkenberg Dana Falkenberg Zoe Falkenberg J Joseph Ferguson Darlene E Flagg RADM Wilson F Flagg, USNR, Retired 1stLt Richard P Gabriel, USMC, Retired Ian J Gray Stanley R Hall Michele M Heidenberger Bryan C Jack Steven D Jacoby Ann C Judge Chandler R Keller Yvonne E Kennedy Norma Cruz Khan Karen Ann Kincaid Dong Chul Lee Jennifer Lewis Kenneth E Lewis Renee A May Dora Marie Menchaca Christopher C Newton Barbara K Olson Ruben S Ornedo Robert Penninger Robert R Ploger III Zandra F Ploger Lisa J Raines Todd H Reuben John P Sammartino George W Simmons Donald D Simmons Mari-Rae Sopper Robert Speisman Norma Lang Steuerle Hilda E Taylor Leonard E Taylor Sandra D Teague Leslie A Whittington CAPT John D Yamnicky, Sr, USN, Retired Vicki Yancey Shuyin Yang Yuguag Zheng List of Victims on United Airlines Flight 93 Christian Adams Lorraine G Bay Todd Beamer Alan Beaven Mark K Bingham Deora Frances Bodley Sandra W Bradshaw Marion Britton Thomas E Burnett Jr William Cashman Georgine Rose Corrigan Patricia Cushing Jason Dahl Joseph Deluca Patrick Driscoll Edward Porter Felt Jane C Folger Colleen Fraser Andrew Garcia Jeremy Glick Lauren Grandcolas Wanda A Green Donald F Greene Linda Gronlund Richard Guadagno Leroy Homer, Jr Toshiya Kuge CeeCee Lyles Hilda Marcin Waleska Martinez Nicole Miller Louis J Nacke, II Donald Arthur Peterson Jean Hoadley Peterson Mark Rothenberg Christine Snyder John Talignani Honor Elizabeth Wainio Deborah Ann Jacobs Welsh Kristin Gould White

To the stalker from Yorkshire, England — what gives?

This isn’t the first time you’ve been combing this blog for posts about Camuso and Purv. You’re one of the reasons I still have to use all the bells and whistles protection apps from my PI.

Over 75 views, mostly posts about Camuso, some about Purv. Now you’re looking for posts about “Sam’s girls.” Are you friends with Camuso and Purv, or are you just checking their references?

Interesting viewing choices. Those are only a snippet of the 75 pages you’ve viewed in the last 4 days. Search words for Abbie, Mauzy, Cody, ugly and fat. Viewing habits that are strictly Camuso/Purv/Criminal/Sam’s Sex Life-oriented. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you don’t have my best interest at heart.

Happy birthday, Amanda!

A toast to you today, and every day.

I wish I had all the good words to express both the depth of my pride, and my admiration. Your journey hasn’t been an easy one, but it has been a remarkable one. Your strength and wisdom are inspiring always. I wish all our readers could know the spirit of your sweet soul as I do.

It’s been an honor to have a front row seat these past 5 years.

All my love, hon. xoxoxo

The second one about the wedding.

By now I’m sure most of you have seen this photo. It was obviously leaked. As of this writing, there is no doubt. If it wasn’t posted on the official Starz account, or on the account of anyone who works on set, it was leaked.

I don’t know who leaked it, I’m not sure anyone does. There are several suspects who come to mind, though. At the top of the list is Starz, of course. Why not? It’s entirely possible that Starz leaked that photo in an effort to clean up the giant doody that Cait dumped on the fandom 3 weeks ago. Maybe this is yet another awkward attempt on their part to re-engage the fandom. Maybe they’re trying to steer fans away from aggressive shipping, and more into gentle affection. It could also have been leaked by a pissed off crew member who knows the truth, and isn’t afraid of breaking their NDA.

Unfortunately, both theories feel wrong. For starters, the quality isn’t good enough. I’m certain Starz has a lot better quality stuff they could release. Also, if it had been Starz, they wouldn’t have been so obtuse. They would have proudly posted it directly on their own Instagram account with some smarmy caption like “Can you still feel the chemistry after all these years?”

If it had been a crew member who wanted to screw them and give a big middle finger to the NDA, they would have leaked a more damning photo, plus they wouldn’t have helped to identify themself via the angle at which the photo was shot.

Since it’s probably not Starz, and it’s probably not someone on set, that only leaves one likely party. That leaves the party of fuzzy pictures, and cuckolding. The sister wife, and her two husbands — Caitriona Balfe, Sam Heughan, and Tony McGill.

There’s nothing terribly scandalous about the photo. Just two friends hanging out, chatting it up with the crew. Except for one thing. If that red haired guy was my husband, and he got paid to do this with that brown-haired girl

And I also saw him do this to her

and later do this to her

and then I saw them sitting like this during their break?

I wouldn’t be a very happy wife. I would see that photo and it would feel like a punch to the gut. Something is going on. I can’t think of anyone for whom it wouldn’t feel the same.

Likewise, if a man was married to the brown-haired lady, and she was paid to do this

with someone who hung out with her, and looked at her like this

and she looked at him like this

and this,

and fooled around with him like this,

and this,

I can’t imagine that husband would have seen this

and not have felt some pangs of insecurity.

They aren’t doing anything immoral in the photo. Quite the contrary. They’re just standing next to each other, chatting it up with the crew. In isolation, the photo is harmless. As part of a body of behavior over the last 5 years, not so much. There is no getting around the truth: they spend more time with each other than two people who play lovers onscreen should, they stand closer off set than two people who play lovers onscreen should, they seem more comfortable with each other than two people who play lovers onscreen should, and their lives are more intertwined than two people who play lovers onscreen should. Especially since the red haired guy bought the brown-haired lady’s old apartment, and sleeps in her old bedroom.

All these “shoulds” however, would be moot if they were lovers in real life. It would explain a lot.

So yes, this photo was leaked, and yes it was intentional, and yes it was meant to get us talking. Seen in isolation, it’s a cute photo of two co-stars hanging around in between takes. Except it’s not in isolation. Nothing is ever in isolation, not anymore.

We have 5 years of photo drops. Five years of learning exactly how the game is played. Five years to learn that what Cait and Sam say, and what Cait and Sam do are not the same thing #bekindwilliamshatner. Ironically, now when their lies are at their dooziest, it’s the time when so many have decided to take them at their word.

Everyone sees things differently, I guess.

If we can’t agree on the color of a dress, how can we expect to agree on the reason behind this?

Something tells me we weren’t meant to. Someone leaked that photo, and by process of elimination, the most likely someones are in the photo.

It only follows then, that it was they who arranged for the theatre photo to be taken, and they who had it leaked. It was they who arranged for the coffee photos, and used that blogger to further their narrative (EDITOR’S NOTE: “Leaves” don’t fall in April.) It was they who arranged for that gin-soddened eyewitness in Bruton to give us the gift of Caitony planning their nuptials. It was they who planted “A. McGill” on the church calendar the day before the big event, and leaked it to Tumblr. And, it was they who arranged with the Sarah Huckabee Sanders of entertainment journalists, Lynette Rice, to claim an exclusive announcement of a wedding, by publishing information that was lifted from Jess’ blog and Sam’s Instagram.

Let’s talk about how it’s done, and how they did it. Let’s talk about “PR”.

There are more than a few in this fandom who have claimed public relations as their professional calling. I’m one of them. As a general practitioner of communications arts, I studied public relations in graduate school, after which I plied my trade for agencies, became an independent consultant, and I continue to practice what I preach with my own businesses today.

My experience in the entertainment industry is miniscule. That is to say, I would be lying if I claimed it to be my area of expertise. It’s not. But, as is the case with any good PR professional, it’s our job to listen and learn. My instincts are good enough that I can make a few forced errors, but still manage to pitch a decent 5 inning game on an unfamiliar field. Any good PR pro could.

Here’s what I know: I know that regardless of the industry, the basic tools of good communications are the same. I also know the secret weapon of every good communicator is their gut. There are a few basic maxims that all pros know.

  1. Control your narrative. No one else will tell your story as well as you –be the story-teller as well as the person about whom the story is being told.
  2. Nature abhors a vacuum. In the absence of information, the void will always be filled. Make sure you’re the one to fill it. (SEE #1)
  3. Always put a positive spin on negative news.
  4. If the full truth can’t be told, but information needs to be disseminated nonetheless, say as little as possible. Go heavy on information that will do no harm. Try to redirect the narrative to a safe zone.
  5. Repetition is essential to imprinting your message.
  6. Make your story clear, vivid, and believable.
  7. Humanize your story/product/client. Make it/them relatable.
  8. Be courteous, polite, provide talking points, follow-up on all inquiries, and always have further information at the ready for questions and reinforcement.
  9. Anticipate and prepare for problems that inevitably come.

Those are some of the basics. There are more, of course.

Let’s see how well Caitriona has done.

She dropped the ball right out of the gate. The texts/phone calls/smoke signals requesting a comment went unreturned.

Second bad form was enlisting someone as controversial as Lynette Rice, the sister from another mister to the other klassy ladies who were tasked with sharing Caitriona’s secrets — Melissa Hoyer in Australia, and Lady McNaughtington in Bruton. (SEE #8 above)

The “engagement” was leaked by Melissa Hoyer, a television personality (?) and a random Instagrammer from Australia, who did such a professional job of floating the trial balloon of Caitriona’s engagement, she changed her post 7 times before deleting it altogether. Sixteen months later, the location of Caitriona and Tony’s wedding was leaked by a foul-mouthed drunk in the middle of nowhere, England, who decided insulting shippers would be a fun secondary activity while she downed her 5th frothy beverage. (When in doubt, always use the word “cunt”. It’s never not a welcome word in a fandom comprised of 99% women.)

“Sources say”. We love unconfirmed information in this fandom.

(Relax, everyone. He dumped his leading “lading”, not his leading “lady”. Unfortunately, they “did” season 4.)

Naturally Lynette didn’t write the article herself. She needed some help gathering all the exclusiveness. Doubtless she assigned herself to the Sam portion of the announcement. When he didn’t return her call, she went to his Instagram account, where she took journalistic license by saying he “appeared” to be at the wedding.

Her co-author, Phil, tried to get the bride on the phone for a statement and confirmation, but when she wouldn’t return his calls, he went straight to Jess’ blog to get the name of the church. Eric tried to get Cait’s agent and publicist on the phone, but when they didn’t return his call, he Googled “who is Caitriona Balfe?” and saw that she had exclusively told People about her engagement on the day of the Golden Globes #timesup.

The three of them, all representing People magazine, somehow managed to get no one to return their phone calls for an article they claimed was an exclusive, the information of which had all appeared on fan sites days earlier.

No time to wait for confirmation because of a deadline? The People announcement appeared on August 15. Cait got “married” on the 10th; Sam posted his Instagram photo on the 12th. Lynette and her team ostensibly had 3 days to wait for confirmation after Sam posted on Instagram. Three days went by when no one from Cait’s camp could be bothered to return a call to People magazine. The announcement first appeared on People’s digital platform. They could have waited another day or two for the return phone call. It’s Cait Balfe and Tony McGill. No one’s in a hurry.

Let me tell you something about a phone call that doesn’t get returned to an entertainment outlet with nearly 50 million readers, a month before an actor is set to star in their first feature film in 3 years. Not only is it across-the-board bad form to be in a service industry and not return a phone call for a quick, official statement, it’s absolutely dumb AF. Why would you not return a call to People magazine to confirm what your client has worked overtime to leak? There is only one reason. It’s not summer vacation and it’s not time zone differences. Caitriona Balfe doesn’t want her “marriage” to Tony McGill to be on the record. That fact is abundantly clear.

It was abundantly clear when Sam carefully skirted details of his remarkable weekend. It was abundantly clear when he didn’t geotag his remote location. It was abundantly clear when he commercialized a sacred day. It was abundantly clear when the sisters’ Facebook conversation was deleted. It was abundantly clear when not a single person who posted about their trip to

mentioned the name of the bride or groom. It was abundantly clear when the bride ignored all congratulations. It was abundantly clear when the bride didn’t acknowledge her own marriage. It was abundantly clear when there wasn’t a single photo of the bride, or a fan photo at the church. It was abundantly clear when no one on the cast and crew other than clueless Diana Gabaldon offered congratulations. It was abundantly clear when photos showed up on her friends’ Instagram accounts of the “English countryside”, minus actual people. It was abundantly clear when only one name — A. McGill — appeared on the church calendar. It was abundantly clear when a 5 day old wedding announcement made by People magazine couldn’t scare up a quote, a confirmation, or a return phone call.

This isn’t “wishful thinking”, my friends. This isn’t “hoping it’s not true to keep the ship afloat”, or hoping I haven’t been wrong all along. This is what years of public relations training does to someone. The underlying message always breaks through the clutter with folks like me. PR pros are the ones who generally can’t be snookered, because we’ve done the snookering once or twice ourselves. We know the tricks. We know how to parse words, fill the voids in a story by saying a whole lot of nothing, use the jargon that makes us appear to offer timely and official information, imply something is canon when it’s not, etc. We know how the game is played. Our sensitivity to messaging is our third eye.

If no one returned their phone calls to confirm, how did Lynette et al even know about the wedding, and how were they given an exclusive? How do you get to claim an “exclusive” when nothing you’ve posted has been officially confirmed, the information you’re sharing is 5 days old, and is extracted from fan blogs? How exactly does that happen?

Here’s a similar alphabetically-ranked actress to Cait.

“It was a beautiful setting for a wedding, very peaceful and quiet,” a source told E! News. The vows were brief and lasted about 15 minutes. There was lots of cheering and applause as it ended.”

There are quotes, and color commentary.

“…showing off her diamond ring… on Instagram

“…they were photographed kissing on the beaches of Cancun, Mexico.”

That’s a tough one. Does this count?

Moving on.

Here’s another.

I love knowing about a bride’s dress, don’t you? Isn’t that the main attraction of any wedding? No mention of Erdem, or whoever the lucky designer was whose gown hugged her body on the most special day of her life. How very unlike Cait. She’s always giving shout-outs to the deserving. She even managed to thank these satirists.

I’m just going to go with Erdem as the designer, because Cait publicly told them she needed to send them a DM. What other reason for all the secrecy in plain sight?

Who here can totally see her wearing this? Rumor has it the bridesmaids wore the same dress, just backwards, and in a wine color. (SEE #2 above. Nature abhors a vacuum.)

Here’s People’s recent compendium of 2019’s newlyweds.

That’s a lot of “celeb” weddings. Out of the over 70 weddings shown above, one of these things is not like the other. Can you guess which one that is? (No cheating.)

Allow me. Aside from the fact that Cait and Tony are the only “newlyweds” who don’t look happy, they’re among a handful of couples for whom People doesn’t have an official wedding photo. That, in and of itself isn’t a big deal, because each announcement comes with at least one special personal tidbit about the couple that illustrates their love and/or their special day. Except for our lovebirds.

There’s a picture of the happy couple on the bride’s Instagram, and a mention of the rehearsal dinner. Two sentences about their dating life appeared, too.

A guest list, and a guest quote. Plus, the bride’s photo of the two of them on Instagram.

You don’t need no stinking confirmation or wedding pics when you got married at Sting’s vineyard.

These two made it Instagram-official.

A guest list that includes people other than your husband co-star posing in a field by himself is always a good thing. Especially if they’re sweeping up names like Reese Witherspoon and Laura Dern.

Also, Instagram-official.

Quote from the bride. Airtight. They look happy, too.

“Recently I married my best friend and soul mate…” Finally. Someone who has the guts to be proud of their partner.

“She announced the news on Instagram, posting a video [imagine that] of the magical affair.”

“…in a ceremony attended by several of his co-stars.” Hear that, Duncan LaCroix, and Steven Cree? Also, “My new wife…” Next.

“Brittany and I tied the knot on a five-year relationship witnessed by our family and friends,” Zachar told PEOPLE. Blabbermouth.

Guest list. They’ve been together for 8 years. Admitted they were engaged before they made the announcement. Plus, added bonus? They look happy.

They have a kid together. No wedding pics necessary.

“It’s official!!!!! We’re married!!!!” Furlan posted to Instagram, sharing a photo of their dogs in wedding attire.

She’s a reporter. They were introduced to each other by another reporter. I’m ok believing they got married without seeing a photo, or reading a quote. That, and bonus — they look happy together.

And, finally, I’ve saved the best for last.

“Balfe and McGill have kept their relationship private [no shit] since they were first spotted together on [Donal Brophy’s Instagram] in early 2015. McGill popped the question over the holidays in 2017, which the actress revealed at the 2018 Golden Globes.” #timesup

It happened over the break. She was very happy. He’s not convinced.

Noticeably absent from the Balfe-McGill announcement? No cast members were mentioned other than of course, Sam. Sam was featured prominently, because he gave them an image people could look at it without having to bleach their retinas. These are the best photographs Lynette Rice could find to illustrate the happy couple.

She looks like she spent most of prom night crying in the bathroom and texting Sam to please forgive her. He looks like she just broke the news that the bar is a goner. I love the “P” for Pinterest in the upper right hand corner, just in case any of us want to ‘pin’ the happy couple on our ‘Caitony’ Pinterest board.

And this photo.

This is the photo that made everyone say “Who’s the Emily Blunt wannabe with Nick Jonas’ dad?”

I don’t want to state the obvious here, but usually a wedding announcement includes a description of what the bride wore, not the bride’s actual husband who was pretending to be a guest at the wedding of his wife to her gay assistant her co-star. Of all people to highlight in Caitriona Balfe’s wedding announcement — Sam Heughan? Sam’s attire was listed because otherwise they had no real information to offer us. They would have been better off just posting a headline “We think Caitriona Balfe got married”, and giving readers a link to jamesandclairefraser on Tumblr. It would have been more informative, and far more entertaining.

The description of what Sam was wearing is called “story filler”. Filler is unimportant information used to make a sparsely factual story longer, and to make it seem more important. It’s a classically used technique for thinly sourced reporting. You know you’re under water when you’re posting this as part of your original announcement.

The article included Sam’s age (not at all germane to the story but that’s sort of People’s signature move), and a full regurgitation of what the readers could see for themselves — Sam’s one line caption and his photo. As if Lynette was doing the seeing-impaired a favor. (This factually-light article required the talents of 3 entertainment journalists.)

Absent from any of the other 70+ People magazine wedding announcements above except for Cait’s, is a solo photo of a celebrity’s colleague, posing by themself in a staged setting, with a caption tagging the designer who made their suit. Over 70 weddings were highlighted, and not a single one featured a guest shilling for the company that made their clothing.

Whatever we do, let us not forget that the posed photo of the guest in question is this guy.

Go ahead, rub your eyes. This guy, the one stealing a kiss, was the guy who was featured in an announcement for her wedding, but he wasn’t the groom. (Did I mention he lives in her old apartment?)

Hookay.

These are synonyms, my friends, not antonyms.

Sam, the one apparent guest, offered no official comment, but he did tag the haberdasher, lest he fail to commercialize the most important day of Caitriona’s life. (Hope she returns the favor by munching on some Colbert eye cream the day Sam ties the knot.)

I have no idea how the poor reverend got dragged into all of this, other than he must be listed as the clergyman of record somewhere on the church’s website. Why would the poor officiant be the only new piece of information in the entire People article?

Make up your mind, town crier. Was it close-knit with just family, or was the frenzy of former makeup artists, assistant directors, scarf designers, and assorted friends all making sure their viewing public knew they were descending on

all a mirage?

Why weren’t Simon Kassianedes, or Karolina Wydra mentioned in the People article? They’re working actors who people might know. Oliver Jeffers is a famous illustrator and author. If Lynette was looking for filler, she need look no further than the Instagram accounts of Cait’s friends [I know, I know — she started with Sam’s Instagram and went down that rabbit hole and never came out]. Naming guests lends legitimacy.

No wedding pics, and no guest list. A claim of privacy for a family-only wedding, but friends and colleagues posted photos of themselves, and the countryside of Bristol. I don’t care which way you slice this story, it’s severely lacking in consistency, content, and sourcing.

We didn’t misunderstand all the signals. Cait and Tony were on the runway with glow-in-the-dark wands. We see you; all clear for landing.

No Instagram acknowledgement on which to add congratulations like this.

((Bonus time. Sam’s new, bisexual girlfriend got in on the act, too. Don’t put that popcorn down just yet, Sam’s got some new bearding to do. At least she comes blue checkmark ready. RIP #Samtina.))

(Sidebar. I’m not sure if we’re going in this direction or not, but if we are, can I put in a request for a two-year gig with Ruby Rose? She and Sam have some seriously compelling chemistry.)

No congratulations from cast and crew. No quotes from guests, no tidbits about a photo booth (spoiler alert: there were shamrocks involved), or food served, or music, or venue, or honeymoon, or any details of their relationshipship other than when Anthony “Tony” McGill popped the question.

It would appear to anyone with eyesight that Cait desperately wants to pass off the lack of essential details as privacy. That would work, if this hadn’t happened.

Whoever made the biggest spectacle of themselves promoting the wedding was tasked with removing these from the #englishcountryside. Colbert Bros? That might be you.

Maybe I should repeat myself until it’s canon. No wedding photo. No quote from the bride. No quote from the groom. No quote from friends, or family or castmates. No wedding guests mentioned other than Sam, no statement confirming the wedding from her publicist or agent. Not from the father of the bride, the brother of the groom, or a single bridesmaid. Everyone who had social media diarrhea pulled down the shades, and brought in the sign.

Most notably absent? The bride herself. Of course.

I get that this is a tough story to easily, quickly and fully digest. It’s extra, for sure. But, it’s off. It’s off, and no one wants to talk about how off it actually is. It’s as off as the engagement, if not moreso, but the appetite for accepting more duplicitousness is barely a blip.

I’m not here to tell you why Sam and Cait are doing what they’re doing, or why Cait wants people to think she got married. I have no idea why. I assume one day we will be told. Whether or not it will actually be the truth is anyone’s guess. I hope for her sake it’s not because there was a juicy role she wanted, or she was afraid of being linked to Sam for the rest of her career. There are a lot of ways to achieve those ends without pretending to get married in a Roman Catholic Church service to your gay personal assistant. Just ask Keri Russell and Matthew Rhys.

Knowing the reason for all of this isn’t essential in order for me to believe this wedding was a charade. It’s not a heavy lift. Out of 71 wedding announcements in People magazine, Caitriona Balfe’s lacked every hallmark of an actual announcement. It was missing every single component that qualifies as something other than spin. It was more notable for what it didn’t say, than what it did.

Who would ask their friends to fly into Bruton just to fake out a bunch of fans? I’m not convinced those friends actually did. Or, if they did, I’m not convinced they attended a wedding reception. Why else would there be no classic wedding photos taken by friends? Why wouldn’t we see bridesmaids? Why were there so many guests who only posted landscape photos? Why did no one take a photograph with the bride and groom and post it on their Instagram? What was preventing Caitriona from allowing that? And, most importantly, what was preventing Caitriona from posting a wedding photo on her own Instagram account?

Here’s the thing about Instagram. It is unarguably the most popular way people (not just celebrities) announce the milestones in their lives. It’s also one of the very few ways that celebrities can share their lives with their fans. It’s not as if Cait doesn’t know that already.

Why can she make fan connections with topics like these, but not about the most significant relationship in her life? What is it about Tony McGill that is preventing her from sharing him with her fans? Is she afraid of the disapproval and trolling? She’s an adult. She should be able to navigate those waters. That’s where a level head should prevail. How hard is it to make a statement, and shut off comments? How hard is it to post her favorite wedding photo of she and Tony, and tell us about the happiest day of her life? How hard is it to explain the reason for disabling comments, and requesting privacy? It’s not hard at all.

What she doesn’t realize is that by not sharing him with her fans, she is saying that not only is Tony not good enough to meet us, we’re not good enough to meet Tony. This is how you know she’s not doing it for her career. She won’t merge her worlds for even the briefest of moments, even if her future success depends on such acts of goodwill.

Celebrities have very few opportunities to connect with their fans in a meaningful way. That connection is critical. Caitriona Balfe wouldn’t have a career past 5 seasons of Claire if it weren’t for the rabid, passionate fan base that propelled her into the limelight and made her a marketable commodity. Her talent alone isn’t good enough to give her the kind of enduring career I imagine she wants. The secret sauce, the X Factor in all of this, is the relationship she has with her viewing audience. There is no question it has cracked under the weight of her lies. Keeping her marriage from us only amplifies the fissures.

One photo. One small, loved up, full of happiness, heart eyes photo of her and Tony, with a caption about marrying her best friend and her soulmate on the happiest day of her life. It would seal the deal forever. It would extinguish shipping forever, and it would solve every problem she thinks she had by not being Mrs. Tony McGill. She would get herself more press. She could stop the ceaseless digging for clues, the endless speculation. The lengthy “gotcha” posts by people like me. But, most of all, she would make that much-needed connection with the fans that has been so glaringly absent from her repertoire over the last several years.

She has to decide now how far she wants this to go. I will never underestimate her ability to make a bad situation worse. It’s becoming her brand. Which brings me back to my original thread — PR.

Oliver Lansley is the creator of “Flack”, a show on Pop TV starring Anna Paquin as a celebrity publicist.

“Everyone can essentially be their own PR machines…in an era where facts can be declared meaningless and “the truth” is different depending on who you ask.”

“The truth is different depending on who you ask.” You don’t say?

I think we can all safely assume that when the truth finally does come out (and one day it will), the actual exclusive of their story will be given to People magazine for it’s stalwart reporting of a fake engagement, and a fake wedding. (Expect to see the byline by Lynette Rice — no sharing this time.)

Still think Sam and Cait control every message we read?

If the devolution of Sam and Cait’s integrity from 2014 until present isn’t enough to convince you that what is intended to appear as organic and authentic is not, nothing will.

Let’s get down to dollars and cents. What is this costing Cait? Probable answer: the cost of a PA’s annual salary. Her media manager/PA/fake husband is likely running the show. Yes, that hapless businessman “husband” is probably the one responsible for buying Cait’s fan follows, getting bots to drive her Twitter numbers up, blocking fans, dropping pics on Facebook, sending anons on Tumblr, hiring hacks for bumbled Instagram posts, following the wrong accounts, retracting posts, and a whole host of other incompetent activities. I’ve said all along that their efforts reek of amateurism. Their casting alone of Tony, Mauzy, Ole’ and now Hannah James, is bordering on farcical.

(That little Vanity Fair Oscar party in 2018 must have cost Sam some serious coin. Looks like he skipped paying his publicist. Cait shined enough attention on him that night by blocking fans and calling Mauzy her dear friend.)

No way are either Cait or Sam paying even $3000/month for a publicist to anonymously drop pics into Facebook and Tumblr of her and Tony at the airport, Sam and Cait at the theatre, and a photoshopped penis thumb onto Sam’s hand. It doesn’t take a genius to get those tasks done. It just takes a Tony.

What have I been saying? It’s too expensive for either of them to hire a top tier pro to carry out the games they’ve been playing on a weekly, sometimes daily basis. That’s not what publicists do. If her games were moving the needle, Cait wouldn’t be buying close to 1 million followers on Instagram, or paying for bot engagement on Twitter. She wouldn’t have tried to divert attention away from a barely noticeable belly bulge by announcing that she had her period. Of all things. What publicist would suggest telling the world you have your period and you’re bloated, versus ignoring a single comment on Instagram? PR rule of thumb: If a topic isn’t ok for dinner conversation, it’s not ok for Twitter.

“A publicist can make sure your face is out there…and that you get photographed in public…This sort of tactic might help create buzz around your name and thus encourage producers to feel that you are hot property or that you are a name. Maybe”

Maybe. Pap walks, anyone?

This is too heavy a lift to be for her career. It’s too desperate, too reckless, and too risky. It’s just plain perilous, and I have a hard time believing anyone who loves her, let alone gets paid to counsel her, would encourage this behavior for her career.

Charity appearances? Cait makes none. Unlike Sam, she didn’t even give an interview to promote Word Child Cancer after she ran the London Marathon. Attendance at red carpet events? She missed Emmy parties, and pre-Golden Globe parties. She attended one Oscar party. Magazine articles and layouts? Yes, she does get her fair share. She is very photogenic. Her modeling career is still coming in handy. It’s where we see her most — doing fashion spreads with an interview in women’s magazines. Train her how to do interviews? How about starting with teaching her not using the term “horny grannies” in interviews, or insult fans during Twitter Q&As? Clearly she has not paid anyone for media coaching.

When was the last time you saw Cait in US Magazine’s “Who wore it best?” Never. When did you see Cait featured in “Stars, they’re just like us?” Never. When did you last read about anything related to Cait in an actual issue of People magazine that didn’t involve Tony McGill? Years. (I can’t even recall what it was, but I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt that it happened at least once.) She’s a 4-time Golden Globe nominee who has starred opposite George Clooney, and Christian Bale. Surely she is worthy of inclusion in an article on People-esque topics such as “Favorite Beauty Products” (Colbert, of course.). “Ten Celebs Who Cut Their Locks.” “Look Who’s Turning 40 This Year!” “Celebrity Animals of Instagram.” Something. Anything.

She’s not in these types of articles, because she’s not using the services of a professional publicist on a regular basis. These mentions should be ‘gimmes’ for an actress in her position. People don’t know who she is? That could easily have been remedied over the last few years by capitalizing on her nominations, her beauty, her background and her wit and likability, the latter two of which have mysteriously gone MIA. She should never have had to shout her own name on the red carpet of the Golden Globes in a year in which she was nominated for the fourth time. Caitriona Balfe wasn’t always a tough sell for a publicist. Now, good luck to anyone booking her on a talk show. She’s so open, so vulnerable, so self-effacing and endearing. Publicity for her next movie should be a real barn burner.

Why does this guy always look like he’s working for her?

Video from SamCaitEddie on Tumblr.

“If you screw something up, publicists will make the public statement that fixes everything.” Again, obviously not paying a professional. What pro would have let her get away with some of the stunts she’s pulled without doing cleanup? I can’t recall a single incident when she tried to clean up a mess she’d made. I can think of times when Sam tried to clean up a mess she’d made, but not her.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not suggesting she is without representation. I’m just saying that it doesn’t at all appear as if she pays someone on the regular to help craft her image. And she most definitely did not pay anyone to execute the ham-fisted wedding tale, starting with Pink Lady at the Pub, and ending with the perfect coda of Lynette Rice. “A List” bolted out the door months ago, “B List” heard her mother calling her for dinner, and “C List is acting as if they’re overbooked for the second seating.

This isn’t a professional hit job. It’s an unconfirmed, innuendo-laden narrative, concocted with cavernous amounts of plausible deniability. From Sam’s “remarkable” weekend post without any emoji reference to a wedding, nor geotagging from

to the myriad of scenic country Instagram posts, to the comically obvious posting of the name of a celebrity’s fiancé’.

to Cait’s sisters’ tortured attempt at a now apparently-deleted conversation

Good grief, you two. I’ve seen more subtlety from a 3year old who just stole a cookie in front of my eyes.

Allow me to repeat myself yet again as part of effective messaging.

No pictures of the wedding. No pictures of the bride. No pictures of the groom. No pictures of the attendants. No pictures of the church. No pictures of the flowers. No gown mentioned. No designer thanked. No groomer thanked. No guests other than Sam mentioned. No family mentioned. Nothing about the groom mentioned. Nothing about the venue, or the food. No quotes from guests, no first-time-they-met stories, no rehearsal dinner, or honeymoon stories.

The only thing we know is the bare minimum. A. McGill got married in a Roman Catholic ceremony to someone on August 10. Diana Gabaldon was not invited anywhere near Bristol, England, to A. McGill, or C. Balfe’s wedding. A bunch of Cait’s friends said they went to Bristol, England. Lynette Rice posted an exclusive using information found on the internet. The message was clear, the details were not: Caitriona Balfe got married.

Why is it ok that we know she got married, but not ok for her to acknowledge it?

Am I worried that in so blatantly challenging her, I’m going to up the ante and force her hand? Am I worried that she’s just vindictive and irrational enough that the more her story is challenged, the more she’ll rise to the occasion by dominating New York Comic Con with talk of Tony? (She wouldn’t dare pull a stunt like that for her upcoming movie.) Am I afraid my pulling back the curtain will only cause her to post a ginned up photo of she and Tony? A little. But, then I ask myself “So? What would change if she did a bona fide acknowledgement of her soul mate, and her best friend?” Nothing. Nothing would change except for her. She would have dug her hole that much deeper. I’ll be fine. We’ll be fine. She will not. She can take this thing all the way to Tony baby daddy territory, and it won’t make a bit of difference for me. I’m not buying any of it. So, go ahead, Cait. Take your best shot. Sorry to the rest of you if you feel I’m taunting her to double down. That’s on her, not me.

Remember PR rule #1 above. Control your narrative. No one else will tell your story as well as you –be the story-teller; not the person about whom the story is being told. She should have told it thoroughly, and completely the first time. Anything after August 10 is playing defense. I just hope it doesn’t get ugly. It has a tendency to do that.

One last thing that’s unrelated, but yet related. Sam’s whiskey, Sassenach. It was named after Cait. There’s no doubt in my mind. No matter what you think of him, you know in your heart of hearts he’s a sentimentalist. He’s a romantic. He’s the guy who doodles on lemons, gives back rubs, and makes the bed. Those kinds of guys don’t grow on [lemon] trees. Not only do I believe he named his company after Cait because he’s a sentimental fool, but because it’s actually a pretty common thing for entrepreneurs to do. I’ve named businesses after family members, products after my kids, and companies after my dogs.

He did it. You know he did. If this had been a year ago, you all would have squealed with delight. I would have, too. It makes me sad there is no squealing at such a tender gesture. I wonder if he’s sad, too. I’m going to cut him a break on this one, though, and not talk about the logo. He’s going through a difficult enough time as it is. He’s dating a bisexual, and his wife married her gay assistant. Life comes at you fast.

Happy Labor Day Weekend

[Editor’s Note. For those of you who are not regular readers, or who just don’t “get” me, please read the following knowing it was written from a place of disbelief.]

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Someone is working too hard.

This. I wondered how long it would take him. I assumed it was only a matter of time.

Caitriona Balfe is “married” now to Tony McGill. She’s off the market, and for better or worse, for richer for poorer, it’s canon. It happened on August 10, 2019, coincidentally or not, on the 5th year anniversary of the debut of the tv show that catapulted her career. It happened in rural England, where she and her long-term boyfriend/fiance’, Tony, were surrounded by family, friends and colleagues in a semi-private, Roman Catholic ceremony. Afterwards they partied until the wee hours with their nearest and dearest, all of whom made the long trek to the remote village of Bruton, England. Caitriona Balfe-McGill is ready for her next chapter; ready to build a new life, and possibly even start a family. Confirmed by People magazine in an exclusive. Confirmed by her friends, and colleagues. Confirmed by Diana Gabaldon. Confirmed by her sisters, and the church, and the priest. Confirmed by Sam himself with a solo photo celebrating a remarkable weekend of love.

Her marriage is out there now, no backsies. It’s in her bios, and her Wiki page. It’s in her Google searches. It’s on Facebook, and Instagram, and Twitter, and Tumblr, and Snapchat, and Pinterest. It’s on websites, and on blogs. It’s being discussed publicly, and privately. Congratulations have been issued, private messages have been sent and received, and no doubt presents have been bought.

Caitriona Balfe is not Sam Heughan’s toy, anymore. No more flirtatious inferences. No more cuddling tightly on the same couch. No more Sam “stretching” his arm across the back of Cait’s chair during myriad interviews. No more “hon”, or “wifey”. No more putting her head on his shoulders, or grabbing his arm for comfort. No more thanking “my partner every day.” No innuendo, knowing glances and insider smiles. No more giggling at private jokes. No double entrendres. Nothing. It’s over for the two of them. There is too much retconning required. Too much explaining to do. There will be no more feeding of the trolls. They’re caput.

Cease and desist.

For those of you who were not around when the video from which Sam’s tweet first dropped, let me just say this — if ever there was a fandom era that defined the sheer, unmitigated joy of SamCait, it was Paleyfest 2015 first, and that video second.

Possessive Cait was the best Cait.

It’s hard to see these images, now. They feel like a dull ache; a sentimental sadness.

I wondered how long it would take Sam until he couldn’t take it, anymore. The new normal is out there, and there’s no putting the genie back in the bottle. Cait’s “married”, and not to him. She’s “married” and she is receiving congratulations. He’s no doubt answering lots of questions.

It was no surprise then, (at least not to me), when he tweeted the most iconic of SamCait images at a time when the distance between the two of them is eons greater than a mere keyboard stroke intended to extinguish their couple name. There was one message he wanted out there, whether or not it was universally understood, or whether or not it even made a ripple in the avalanche of counter-info. He searched the internet until he found it, (complete with closed captioning), and he attached it to the most incongruent of tweets yesterday. He knew he’d be accused of trolling, but he didn’t care. The message was clear and unequivocating. It’s what Sam does.

“He’s my husband.”

Just hand me the tin foil hat now. I’m going full-on. It’s only $9.52, and it’s ready-made. No fussing with multiple sheets, and tailoring it to my head. I’ve got Prime, too, which means I should have it by Tuesday.

When exactly were you “amo-ing” Spain, Cait?

That hashtag from that random was too weird, and too coincidental. We all knew Sam was there at the time. Why troll with Cait, of all people? People never troll with SamCait sightings. They troll with SamRandomGirl sightings. At the time, Cait was fake engaged. There was more than one weird tagging of both of them that same day. Three that I know of (the power of 3s). I know I frown on the one in a million coincidences that seem to happen in Outlanderia, but this one seemed coordinated at the time. Even moreso in retrospect.

Spain? Of all places to pretend to be today — Spain? Really?? Could photos that prove nothing be far behind? Is the eyewitness who saw her at (fill in the blank) in Spain going to comment on Instagram when she posts a photo, or when we get a photo of her with a fan who swears he was with her yesterday?

You guys are trying to give Nancy Drew a run for her money, aren’t you?

Just hook me up for a gross of them tin foil babies. Whatever I don’t use as outerwear, I’ll save for Thanksgiving leftovers.